User:Kibblekip/Sandbox/The Days Have Worn Away/Transcript

The Days Have Worn Away

[The first page is a cover image, depicting a young girl on her knees with her hands to her face. Behind her is shards of broken glass, and a set of stairs leading up to an orange glow. Surrounding the girl is debris and broken furniture, as well as a woman and man laying on the ground — the latter wearing a stack of top hats — with their arms linked, both deceased] DEDICATED TO RICK MAY ONE HELL OF A SOLDIER [The following page depicts another image of the young girl in the same position, now on the edge of a small dock over a frozen body of water. A different woman and man — the latter still depicted wearing multiple hats — lay in the same position as the previous pair, buried under the ice] BADLANDS, NEW MEXICO [A third cover image shows the young girl in the same position again, now kneeling on and surrounded by various blueprints. Another woman and man — the latter once more depicted wearing a stack of hats — lay next to her, both with visible deep green veins, each with a spilled cup beside them. The liquid from these cups is also a deep green] SEVEN YEARS LATER [The comic opens to vultures in a desert, scavenging for food. They stand around several skeletons, some slightly buried in the sand. Suddenly, one of the vultures is shot with a 'BLAM' sound, causing the others to fly away] [The angle shifts to show a prison in the background, with a worn sign reading 'BADLANDS CORRECTIONAL INSTITUTE' 'ESCAPEES WILL BE SHOT ON SIGHT' and many more skeletons scattered around the desert] Voice A: I get him? Voice B: You got him. I wish the inmates still tried to escape. [The voices are revealed to be security guards in a watch tower, one brandishing a rifle, the other using binoculars] Prison Guard A: Used to get a runner out in the bone ocean three, four times a week. Prison Guard B: Hey, Frank— you...? [In the distance, a white cloud of dust can be seen] Prison Guard B: Do you see that? Out there on the horizon? Frank: Nobody's even tried since he took over. When they moved him here, I gave him a week. [The view changes to the courtyard, showing several men — most covered in tattoos and wearing prison attire such as orange sweatpants and white tanktops] Frank: ["That was seven years ago."] ["Now all the gangs...] ["The Skulls, The Tongs, The Diablos...] ["Nobody lights a cigarette without his say-so."] [The scene changes to a prison cell, with a nervous skinny man sitting on a bed. Two men are opposite him, one doing weightlifting on a bench with bandages wrapped around their hands, the other — a larger bodied man — spotting for the weightlifter] Prison Guard B: ["Frank?"] Frank: ["They think he's immortal. I think they might be right."] Guard B: ["Frank, I think something's coming."] Inmate A: I am so... ...so... ...so sorry. Inmate B: Two more. Come on. Inmate C: ...PFFH Inmate A: And not just sorry 'cause I know you're gonna kill me. I am genuinely sorry. I didn't even know you ran a card hustle. But now I know. No more cards. Cards are your thing. Inmate C: ...PFFH Inmate B: Last one. Get after it. Inmate A: And I also know you do... terrible things to guys who cross you. And I don't wanna be one of those guys. Which is why I'm here. Apologizin'. Inmate C: ...PFFH [Inmate C hands the bar up to the larger bodied man] Inmate C: Rack it, T-Bone. You know, [[Diego... ...they say pain is weakness leaving the body... [Inmate C begins to unwrap the bandages around his hands, revealing them to have the letters 'WZRD LIFE' tattoed across each finger from right to left hand. Inmate A — Diego — stiffens up and begins to sweat] Inmate C: ...but it's really more like agony entering it. Here. Let me show you. [Inmate C is revealed to be Merasmus, with various tattoos covering his body. The words 'ABRA KADABRA' are tattooed across the upper portion of his chest, and Tom Jones' face on his lower left arm] PART SEVEN: THE DAYS HAVE WORN AWAY [Merasmus gets up and begins to approach Diego, of whom is physically recoiling in fear] Diego: Please. Merasmus. Don't do any... magic on me. Merasmus: Oh, don't worry, Diego... [He grabs Diego by the neck and lifts him into the air, choking him in the process] Merasmus: ...I wouldn't waste good magic on you. Diego: KKGH GHFFH [Suddenly, a loud 'CHKK' sound is made as a shovel raises out of the ground behind Merasmus. The RED Soldier emerges from the hole created, much to the shock of Merasmus] Soldier: Hello, convicts. Is there a shrivelled up old mummy in this prison? Merasmus: Soldier!? Soldier: Oh, hi, Merasmus. Merasmus: But— but what are you doing here? [Soldier climbs out of the hole, followed by Zhanna, of whom now dons a prosthetic hand] Zhanna: We are breaking you out. Merasmus: You— I— and who are you? Soldier: Merasmus, meet my new roommate! Zhanna: I am his wife. Soldier: But we are also roommates. You've been replaced, Merasmus! Hurts, doesn't it? I bet you'd like to kill her. [Zhanna points at Merasmus aggressively] Zhanna: Kill me? I would like to see you try. Soldier: I think we'd all like to see that, honey. Zhanna: Listen to Zhanna, magical man. I will pull rabbit out of your ass with my foot. My foot will also be up rabbit's ass. [T-Bone grabs Zhanna's neck, slowly choking her and causing her face to turn red] T-Bone: Hey. No one touches the big guy. Let's all just— [Suddenly, a small blond-haired child wearing a helmet akin to Soldier's climbs up T-Bone's back, and attempts — but fails — to snap his neck with a cut off 'NECK SN-' as Zhanna's face begins turning from red to blue"] Blond child: NFF Zhanna: You can do it, honey. [The child successfully breaks T-Bone's neck, finishing the neck snap with a '-AP' sound. The view angle changes to show a horrified Merasmus with Soldier standing behind him, and the helmet-wearing child now riding the shoulders of an eyepatch-wearing child in celebration] Merasmus: T-BONE! Soldier: We're busting you out Merasmus. Big things are happening! I'm in. My wife is in. But son... ...we can't do it without you. [Soldier puts his hand on Merasmus' shoulder. Merasmus looks at Soldier with bright, hopeful eyes] Merasmus: Soldier, I... I don't know what to say... you want me to join Team Fortress? Soldier: What? No, that's stupid. Zhanna: We need babysitter. [Zhanna holds the eyepatch-wearing child and helmet-wearing child's shoulders] Zhanna: General Patton Doe... Georgia Washington Doe... I want you both to meet your Uncle Merasmus. Merasmus: Those are... ...the filthiest children I have ever seen. [The view shifts over to the Soldier, of whom is now fully nude and sitting on a toilet while holding one of Merasmus' books. The rest of his family is approaching the toilet while also undressing] Soldier: Well, don't start handing out awards yet. Because I am about to use your toilet. All of us are. Once I go the kids get jealous. Zhanna, look at the size of this thing around my ass. Prison's been good to you, Merasmus. It's a shame you're leaving. Merasmus: I'm not leaving, Soldier! I have a home here! People respect me! Soldier: Really? Why? Merasmus: You and your family finish... ...toileting, and get out of my prison! Soldier: We're not going anywhere, Merasmus. Not without you. [Merasmus walks over to the prison bars and listens, with many 'SMASH' and sounds coming from the hallway] Merasmus: That's where you're wrong, Soldier! Listen! The guards are coming for you! Soldier: Those aren't guards. That's the Korean Mafia. They were right behind us. [Soldier gets off of the toilet and begins putting his clothes back on, as a now naked Zhanna uses the toilet and attempts to read one of Merasmus' scrolls] Merasmus: What? Why are the Korean Mafia after you? Soldier: They're not, they're after you, Merasmus. Merasmus: What on earth for? Soldier: Well... it started when I borrowed a lot of money from the Korean Mafia and told them it was you. [Soldier puts his hand on Merasmus' shoulder] Soldier: Now I know what you're thinking: why would I need a lot of money? To answer that question I will need to ask you a question: Merasmus: Okay... Soldier: Have I told you... ...that you owe a lot of money to the Korean Mafia? Merasmus: Yes! And they're getting closer! [Soldier approaches the previously dug hole, as Zhanna and their children stand to each side; Georgia is using the toilet, while Patton is removing honey from a jar] Soldier: Crap. We should really be escaping right now. Everyone! Back into the hole! [He puts a hand around the now disheartened Merasmus' shoulder] Soldier: ...as soon as I'm finished telling Merasmus this story. I'd better double time it. We're not even at the start yet. Our story begins— ...no, wait. That's the middle. Merasmus, I feel like I'm confusing you by trying to race through this, so I'm going to slow down. Our story— are you getting this Merasmus: SOLDIER! [The bricks on the wall behind them trail off into calendar pages as Soldier begins to tell the story] Merasmus: ["Just tell me the end of the story."] [The scene changes to near the end of the previous comic as Miss Pauling is giving her speech to the TFC Heavy, while Saxton Hale, Maggie, Zhanna, and all of the mercs besides the Engineer stand behind her. Medic is holding a baby chimpanzee] Miss Pauling: You want to know how we beat you? [The view shifts to only show Soldier, Zhanna and Heavy standing together] Soldier: Look at us all standing around here, chumming it up like a bunch of schoolkids. Heavy: We are watching a man die. Soldier: Like a bunch of silly schoolkids. I am going to get Zhanna pregnant. Heavy: Yes, you have mentioned it. Soldier: Yes, but not recently. Heavy: Yes, recently. Multiple times in last several hours. Miss Pauling: Maybe it was just luck. Maybe it was something else. I don't know what to tell you. But either way... we're Team Fortress Soldier: Anyway, I am going to get her pregnant. Zhanna: Yes. [Heavy's face scrunches in disapproval, as Soldier kneels down in front of him, holding up a grenade. Behind them Miss Pauling and Spy can be seen] Soldier: I am on my knee, asking you for your sister's hand in marriage. Heavy: No. [Soldier turns around to face Zhanna, taking his helmet off] Soldier: Alright. Well, I tried. Zhanna, you want to get married? Zhanna: Yes. [Zhanna removes the pin from the grenade and kisses Soldier, wearing the pin like a ring. As they kiss, the grenade explodes behind them. Soldier begins to undress, but is interrupted by Heavy] Heavy: Zhanna. This man cannot support you. We do not even pay this man. He lives in a cave. Soldier: Hold on, honey, we might need to table this impregnation. Zhanna: Ugh. Fine. Soldier: Why does everyone think I have no money? Heavy: Because you live in cave. [Suddenly, Soldier pulls out a subtly glowing, yellow tinted rock and holds it up infront of him] Soldier: Lined with gold! I only live in the cave so no one steals it. And now I don't have to defend my vast cave fortune alone. She has married into defending the cave! It's our cave now! We can sleep in shifts! It will be heaven! Heavy: This is... not gold. [Miss Pauling abruptly snatches the Australium rock away and looks at it in awe] Miss Pauling: Soldier, where did you get this? Soldier: In my cave! There's tons of it! Raccoons won't touch the stuff. Miss Pauling: You guys: we did it. Not the way we planned, but we did it. Soldier's cave has enough Australium for centuries! [As Miss Pauling stares at the rock, the yellow glow lighting up her face, Spy stands off to the side] Spy: We could sell it and— Miss Pauling: Exactly. We could bring it back to the Administrator. [Her reflection beams back off of the rock] Miss Pauling: I'll get a promotion! I could be her second in command! [She then points to a plane, as Saxton Hale and Maggie approach] Miss Pauling: Come on, everybody in the plane! Saxton Hale: Where are we going? Soldier: I was just telling Miss Pauling about the Australium— [Miss Pauling suddenly covers Soldier's mouth, interrupting him] Miss Pauling: And how it's gone! It's alllllll gone! There is no more! So we're all... ...we're all going home! [She gives an unconvincing smile, as Saxton Hale and Maggie exchange unimpressed glances, before smiling at eachother] Saxton Hale: Well, there's only one thing left to do, Mags.... Maggie: You thinkin' what I'm thinkin', Sax? Saxton Hale: You know it! Let's go get Mann Co back. I've got a plan, Mags. I couldn't beat up a little girl to get my company back. But that's because I didn't have a secret weapon. [He grabs Scout by the shoulder and pulls him over] Saxton Hale: This little girl we met at Ayers Rock! Scout: Hey! Saxton Hale: She might not be a match for Olivia Mann yet! But you're gonna train her, Mags! Even if it kills her! Even if— [He stops and looks around, realizing Maggie is nowhere to be seen] Saxton Hale: Mags? Scout: She left, Mister Hale. Saxton Hale: What? When? Scout: Like five seconds ago. While you were yellin' at me. [Saxton Hale throws Scout down on the ground in frustration, while in the background his pilot — Jerry — enters the plane] Saxton Hale: Fine! I'll get my company back without her! Jerry! Whose plane is that? Jerry: No idea, Sir. Looks empty. Saxton Hale: Well, we killed a lot of people here today, Jerry. Probably one of theirs. Fire it up! We're heading to Mann Co! Come on, fists, we've got a plane to catch and then crash. [Meanwhile, Miss Pauling continues to stare at the Australium rock, her expression a manic smile] Spy: Miss Pauling... Miss Pauling: Yes, Spy? Spy: Saxton Hale is stealing our plane. Miss Pauling: Good. That's good. [She snaps back to reality and looks up] Miss Pauling: Wait, what? [As the plane is preparing to take off, Miss Pauling dashes onto the runway, waving her arms] Miss Pauling: Hey! Hey! You stupid half-naked idiot! That's ours! Jerry: There's a hysterical woman screaming at us from the tarmac, Sir. Saxton Hale: Ha! That's a good one. Alright, my turn. I see... there. That cloud looks like a tiger! Miss Pauling: Hey! HEY! That's our— [As the plane takes off with a rumbling 'VRRROOOOOM', Spy runs in and tackles Miss Pauling to the ground. She looks up in dismay at the now airborne plane] Miss Pauling: That— that— that Australian took our plane! Spy: Anything that's not nailed down, yes. It's in their DNA, I believe. Miss Pauling: Now what the hell are we gonna do? We're stuck here. Spy: Well, not necessarily... [He glances over to the bushes, where Sniper is inspecting an abandoned, rusty plane with moss and dirt covering it. Next to the plane is a sign reading 'DO NOT USE' and some gasoline canisters] Spy: What do you think, Sniper? Can you fly it? Sniper: Only one way to find out: let's steal it. [The scene cuts to Miss Pauling and the mercs tightly packed into the plane mid-flight, approaching the entrance of a hidden bunker from the walls of a canyon, with the plane visibly burning up and creating a loud 'VRRRRRRR' sound. The BLU Engineer watches from a balcony, sipping from a cup as everyone parachutes out and the plane crashes nearby. The scene cuts further ahead to Miss Pauling and the mercs inside the lobby of the bunker, the former attempting to talk with a receptionist] Receptionist: I don't see you on the list. Could you spell that? Miss Pauling: F...O...R...T... look, it doesn't matter. We need to see the Administrator. About this. [She slams the Australium rock infront of the receptionist with a loud 'KLNK' and crosses her arms smugly. The receptionist pokes it in confusion with her pen] Receptionist: OK, this isn't a pawn shop. I can't let you past this desk. In fact, you shouldn't even be in the lobby. You need to— [Suddenly, Engineer appears from a balcony on a higher floor of the lobby, as Miss Pauling and the mercs look up at him. To the side, Sniper and Demoman are looking at a statue in the middle of the lobby, depicting figures from the various other mercenary teams and plates with the letters 'A', 'B', 'C', 'D' and 'E' surrounding a Team Fortress 2 logo. At the bottom are broken prongs where a sixth letter was once placed] Engineer: Miss Krauthammer! It's alright! They're with me! Fellahs! It's been a dog's age! Get up here! [The scene shifts to the hallway outside of a break room, with Spy smoking a cigarette, while Pyro and Demoman look at hung-up pictures of the other merc teams; the latter of them is looking at an image of the Demoman from another mercenary team, of whom is clad with technilogically advanced armour and shoulder-mounted rockets] Engineer: ["I gotta tell ya, you have created a real...] ["...a real problem here, Flo."] Miss Pauling: ["I followed my orders, Engie."] Engineer: ["I know, I know..."] ["I just never thought...] ["You'd actually find more."] Miss Pauling: ["Nobody did though, did they?] ["Not any of the 'good' teams, not the Administrator...] ["Not even you."] ["Everybody just thought we'd screw it all up, didn't they?] ["Create a distraction. Let the real mercs save the day.] ["Well, we did it."] [Inside the break room, Miss Pauling and Engineer are sitting at a table, the Australium rock between them] Miss Pauling: I've devoted my whole life to this. To whatever grand plan she had. Or whatever evil plan, who cares. But she'd get there. And I'd be right there with her. I want to see her, Engie. [He gets up from the table and picks up a lantern with key tied to it, then passes it to her] Engineer: Alright. Down the hall. Last door on the left. [He then sits back down and picks up a mug as Miss Pauling begins to exit] Miss Pauling: You're not coming? Engineer: My grandfather never went down there. My father never went down there. [The view shifts to the hallway, with Miss Pauling and the mercs approaching a stone-cut door surrounded by a rocky frame at the end, contrasting the office-like environment of the rest of the hall] Engineer: ["I figure they had a reason.] ["Y'all go ahead."] [Miss Pauling and the mercs enter and descend a spiral staircase, the surrounding environment now dark and cave-like] Scout: Hey, Miss Pauling? There's a good chance we're all going to die down here. So I... I... I need to say somethin'. Miss Pauling: Okay. Shoot. Scout: When I was talkin' to you back in Siberia— well, not you, a miniature fairy version of you— you told me never to give up. To just keep perseverin' and wearin' you down like drops of water borin' through stone... until I got to wherever your heart is and made you realize you love me. And I been thinkin'— maybe you were wrong. No offense. When we were on the plane just now— I was lookin' down at that tiny world out there, and it hit me... there's like eighty million women in the world, probably, and... ...and there's gotta be one of em I don't gotta wear down. No convincin', no gun show— just, boom. "I get it dummy. You're the best." So yeah, I just wanted to... I just wanted you to know that. That I'm movin' on. [She stops and turns slowly to face him] Miss Pauling: You know what, Scout? Those eighty million other women in the world, statistically speaking... a lot of them are probably way hotter than me. Scout: Whoa, really? Miss Pauling: It's math, dummy. Scout: Yeah, it is. [They fistbump with a 'DAP' as they approach the end of the cave, where a bulky metal door blocks their path] Miss Pauling: Alright, we're here. [Miss Pauling places down the lantern and goes to open the door — but hesitates, her face engulfed in darkness] Demoman: We goin' in? Miss Pauling: Yeah, just... after all this... maybe Engie's right. Maybe I don't want to see this. [She looks at the key, but after a brief pause inserts it into the lock with a 'KLIK' sound and begins to open the door as the mercs look on eagerly] Miss Pauling: No. Let's find out once and for all what's back here. Voice: ["Sorry to keep you waiting."] [The scene shifts to one in the distant past, the voice revealed to be a ginger-haired maid — Patience Meriweather — answering the door to a woman with purple hair and a long smoking pipe — Elizabeth] Meriweather: How can I help you? Elizabeth: I'm here about the job. Meriweather: That can't— how did— I was just heading to the newspaper to purchase an ad for the position. [Elizabeth walks in uninvited, passing by Meriweather, of whom now wears a bewildered expression] Elizabeth: Well. A stroke of luck for both of us, then. Now you don't have to. Please go get the master of the house. Meriweather: The lady of the house died recently, you see. We're in need of— Elizabeth: A governess, yes, thank you, I'm all caught up. Please go get the master of the house. [The scene shifts to a study filled with books, and a lit fireplace. In the center of the room a middle-aged man — Zepheniah Mann, on a stepping stool with a hammer and chisel, carving away at a statue of w:The Thinker with a head shaped similarly to his own head. Sitting to the side of him is a scribe writing a letter with a feather pen] Zepheniah: "Dear The Mayor of Paris." My name is Zepheniah Mann. You will remember I purchased Rodin's The Thinker from you." "I have been chiseling its face to match my face, but now the head is too small and misshapen." "It doesn't look anything like I'm thinking anymore. It just looks like I'm on the toilet and scared." [He lowers the chisel to his side, Meriweather appearing behind him and standing in the hallway] Zepheniah: Meadowes, I do look scared to be on the toilet, don't I? Meadowes: Terrified, Sir. Meriweather: Mister Mann? Sir? Zepheniah: "I have enclosed another check. Send another statue with a normal sized body but a very large head, ASAP." Meriweather: Sir? [He turns angrily to face the Meriweather] Zepheniah: "Yours in etc etc, Zepheniah Mann—" WHAT IS IT? Meriweather: There— there's someone at the door for you, Sir. Zepheniah: I see. Is it that woman standing directly behind you? [Elizabeth enters the room unprompted, as Zepheniah heads back to his desk for a cigar] Elizabeth: It is. I'm here for the governess position. Zepheniah: Capital. Let's go for a walk of the grounds. It's too stuffy in here. Cigar? [They make their way out to a snowy courtyard filled with gravestones, almost all with the last name 'Mann' inscribed] Zepheniah: Let me ask you one question... do you know who I am. [Elizabeth exchanges a steely-eyed expression, as they continue up towards a stone mausoleum] Elizabeth: No. Should I? Zepheniah: I suppose not. If you are to take this post, you must harden your heart. I expect unflinching, round-the-clock brutality. If that means they hate you, so be it. Elizabeth: I will make them despise me. Zepheniah: Good. A Mann scion does not need coddling. He needs molding. You will raise my son to be a titan of industry. A self-made man. A stubborn, bloody-minded scoundrel. You must make him into me. Elizabeth: You mean sons. Zepheniah: I do not. This way. [They enter the building, passing by graves with statues representing members of the Mann family lining the sides] Zepheniah: The Mann Family Mausoleum. Not the riff-raff out there. These are the corpses that paid for everything. My grandfather, Ebenezer Mann. Shipping magnate. Youngest of five sons. Every brother in the ground by the time he bought his first fleet. My father, Ezekiel Mann. Railroad tycoon. Middle child. A house fire claimed his three sisters. He weathered the tragedy and was a millionaire before he turned seventeen. Zepheniah Mann. Me. Munitions magnate. Only son, sadly. [They stop infront of an unmarked, empty grave] Zepheniah: And my son. Heir to the Mann family fortune. Name to be determined. That's where you come in. Elizabeth: You want me to kill one of your sons? Zepheniah: Quite the opposite. I want you to teach them. Train them. Mold them both into champions. [Both exit the mausoleum, and stop infront of another unmarked grave with a small, blank headstone] Zepheniah: Until their hereditary instincts kick in and the stronger one kills the other. I'll know you succeeded when we've filled this in. Elizabeth: Yes. I can do this for you. [They both shake hands. Behind them, Meadowes approaches wearing a desk-harness] Zepheniah: Capital. You're hired. And I don't even know your name. Elizabeth: My name is— Zepheniah: That was not a question. I would prefer to keep this professional. You start immediately. I will provide you a letter of introduction. Meadowes. A letter. Meadowes: Yes Sir. Zepheniah: "Dear baby Blutarch and baby Redmond. I hope this letter finds you well. The woman standing before you—" [The scene cuts to Elizabeth approaching a small manor] Elizabeth: ["That will not be necessary.] ["I can make my own introductions."] [The scene cuts back to a room filled with monitors, each depicting images of locations within Team Fortress 2. The Administrator stands in the center of the room infront of a chair, and a small desk littered with files, monologuing to a figure suspended infront of her] Administrator: I'd come to kill the boys, obviously. Smother them in their sleep. [Miss Pauling — now holding the Australium rock — enters the room with the mercs, putting a finger to her mouth as a gesture for them to stay quiet. Their expressions change to shock as they approach] Administator: But that wouldn't have worked, would it? You weren't their father then. [The viewing angle changes to reveal the suspended figure as Zepheniah Mann, restrained by a metal box with multiple Australium-stained pipes attached to it and him from all directions and his eyelids are held open by a hook each. His appearance is that of a corpse, with pure white eyebrows and hair only at the nape of his neck, his mouth constantly agape] Administrator: They were nothing to you. Slabs of stone in need of a sculptor's chisel. You were waiting for your champion. [The scene cuts back in time again to Elizabeth sitting in a room, with two toddlers — Redmond and Blutarch — playing with toys. She watches on as the two begin to fight] Administrator: ["Someone worthy of your time and attention."] ["Your legacy."] ["Your love."] ["If I wanted to destroy you..."] ["...to watch you die cursing my name..."] ["I needed to ensure your champion never emerged."] ["The two little nitwits needed to fight."] [The scene cuts back in time again to Zepheniah Mann in a bed, writing on a parchment paper. He is visibly old, now wearing his signature top-hat, while Elizabeth stands at a balcony smoking a cigarette] Administrator: ["Forever."] Zepheniah: "...damn you all to hell..." No, that's not right. "...damn you all to hell!" Better. Signed... "Zepheniah Mann..." There. I signed the confounded thing! Elizabeth! Elizabeth: I'm coming, Zepheniah. Zepheniah: Elizabeth! I signed it! [Outside, it is revealed they are at a building simply named 'Saloon and Inn'. A wooden sign boarded infront of the saloon's entrance reads 'Mercenaries Welcome'] [ Teufort, New Mexico. 27 years later. ] Elizabeth: Let me see it. [Back inside, Elizabeth is reading through the parchment paper — Zepheniah's will] Zepheniah: I still don't fully understand all this BLU and RED gravel nonsense. But I have complete faith that making my two stumble-bum sons fight over it will finally result in one of them emerging vic— Elizabeth: It won't. [Zepheniah squints in confusion, while Elizabeth returns a smug grin] Zepheniah: ... What? Elizabeth: I lied. Zepheniah: About what? Elizabeth: About everything. All of this— the land, the Americas, all of it. Your sons are going to fight forever, Zepheniah. There will be no end to this. You will never have a worthy heir. [She leans in close, Zepheniah wearing an expression of horror and shock] Elizabeth: I guarantee it. I will be right here. Watching them fight until they die. Zepheniah: ... But why? Elizabeth: Let me tell you. [She leans in closer, whispering into Zepheniah's ear. He turns pale as his eyes widen, before they slowly fade to white. Elizabeth lights a cigarette as she takes the will, packs her belongings and exits, leaving the now-deceased Zepheniah Mann on the bed] [ Mann Manor. One year later. ] [Elizabeth awakens with a smile to sunlight coming through the window, a painting of a dramatic interpretation of her final moments with Zepheniah hung above the bed. She is depicted in a blue and white frilly dress with a red cloak while wielding a sword, one of her shoes planted firmly against Zephaniah's face. She exits to a garden shed for gloves and shears, trimming roses from the various graves in the courtyard, then plucking their petals one-by-one. While holding the newly-beheaded roses, she approaches a small grave covered in even more headless roses with the initials 'Z. M.' inscribed, and smiles gleefully] [Elizabeth awakens to a cloudy day, and exits with a veiled hat and gloves to attend to a beehive. She removes a glove to feel one of the bees, of which promptly stings her. Unphased, she grabs the bee and crushes it, then pulls it away from her now-swollen finger. She removes the gloves and hat as she stands infront of Zepheniah's grave again, now wearing a tired expression] [Elizabeth sits in bed with messy hair, surrounded by ashtrays as a storm creates a downpour outside. She stares ahead of her at Zepheniah's gravestone, now moved to a desk stationed directly infront of the bed. Outside, a carriage drops off a young man in a gray suit, who walks through the courtyard of Mann family graves, coming across a broken set of beehives and a puddle where Zepheniah's grave once stood. He enters the building, and follows a set of muddy footprints up to an attic] Young Man: Hello. [Infront of him is Elizabeth, standing atop a stepping stool holding the end of a noose while smoking a cigarette. He exchanges a smug grin] Young Man: Have I come at a bad time? [Without responding, she puts the noose around her neck and removes the cigarette from her mouth, then kicks the stepping stool from underneath her. The scene turns black, before she slowly awakens to the young man standing infront of her, holding a pair of shears. She reaches for her cigarette] Elizabeth: You should have let me die. Young Man: Oh, I did. [A yellow tube coming from the young man's sleeve is shown to be inserted into Elizabeth's arm, her veins glowing a light yellow. He removes the needle with a 'POIK' sound, the hole left behind in her wrist now a dim orange] Young Man: Yes. Empty now. But I gave you just enough to get back. Madam, do you know who I am? Elizabeth: You're... Gray. Aren't you? Blutarch and Redmond's brother. They told me you were eaten by eagles shortly after birth. Gray: Ha ha! My idiot brothers and their fairy tales. No, I was kidnapped by eagles. I escaped. Speaking of fairy tales... [He looks over at Elizabeth, now wearing an annoyed expression, as she faces away] Gray: ...I also know who you are. Or rather, I know who you aren't. Which is Emily or Elizabeth or Helen or whatever bogus identity you're using at the moment. More importantly, I know what you did to my father. "Elizabeth": So... what? You're here to avenge him? [She holds the frayed end of the noose out infront of her] "Elizabeth": If so, help me back up this ladder and let's get to it. Gray: Hardly. In truth, I'm not that interested in either one of you. [Gray reaches into his coat and pulls out a small yellow pebble, holding it between his fingers] Gray: No, I'm here about the "miracle gravel" my father left you. Do you have it? "Elizabeth": I do. It's fool's gold. Worthless. Gray: As gold, certainly. Because it's not gold. It is a new element entirely. A transformative element capable of extending the human lifespan up to... ...and as we've just discovered, past the point of death. Obviously not of interest to someone... well. But to those of us with the will to continue living... ...it's priceless. I came here to see if you'd sell it to me. But given present circumstances, could I possibly trouble you to just give it to me? ["Elizabeth" — now facing away — stares through a glass window, processing this new revelation] Gray: Madam? [She turns back to face him] "Elizabeth": Of course. I'll need a few days to secure it. Meet me back here in a week's time. Gray: Tremendous. And once I've taken it off your hands, I'll leave you to hang yourself in peace. "Elizabeth": I look forward to it. [As Gray leaves to his carriage, "Elizabeth" stares down through the attic window with a manic smile. The scene cuts to her pulling various tarps, revealing several bars of Australium piled upon eachother. The scene shifts again to a shed outside, where "Elizabeth" — still wearing the noose, but now holding a lantern — acquires a shovel, then makes her way to the burial ground of Zepheniah. She buries the shovel's head into the ground with a 'SCHLK' as she begins to dig] Administrator: ["That was the start of everything."] [The scene changes back to the monitor room, with the Administrator sitting in her chair, reading a file. The monitor screens reflect off of Zepheniah's eyes] Administrator: And we've been at this ever since, haven't we? [She gets up and puts her hand on the side of his face, looking at him with glowing yellow eyes as Miss Pauling and the mercs stare in disgust and horror] Administrator: Just you and me. Miss Pauling: What... what did he do to you? Administrator: Aheh. You know... after all this time... I don't remember. [The Administrator glances back] Administrator: Wait. Why are you here? Did you find some? Did you find more? [She grabs Miss Pauling's shoulders, a crazed expression on her face] Administrator: Miss Pauling, listen to me. This could change everything. Did you find us more? [Miss Pauling holds the Australium rock firmly behind her, frozen with horror as she stares at the Administrator] Miss Pauling: No. I didn't. [The Administrator looks at her in dismay, but begins to smile as she turns away, her face and hair beginning to show age. She faces towards Zepheniah once more] Administrator: It's been a hundred years, hasn't it? Making you watch your sons fail. Again and again. All that... ...wasted time. [As she talks, she begins to age more and more, the yellow glow in her eyes fading away. Both her and Zepheniah tear up as she collapses to the floor, before she wipes away her tears with an evil smile] Administrator: It was worth it. [She leans over on the floor, now holding Zepheniah's body as Miss Pauling and the mercs watch them. One by one, the mercs leave as the Administrator and Zepheniah slowly turn to dust infront of Miss Pauling. The scene cuts back upstairs to the break room as Miss Pauling walks in — dust staining her dress and trailing behind her, as she places the Australium rock and her bag upon the table and sits down, the yellow glow of the Australium lighting up her weary eyes. Engineer places a glass of water on the table infront of her, then sits down as well] Engineer: It's yours now. What are you gonna do with it? Miss Pauling: I don't know. Engineer: Guess you know the big secret now. Never was about takin' over the world for her. Wasn't even about revenge. Not by the end, anyhow. By the end it weren't about nothin'. Bu it could be. Could be about whatever you thought she was doing. [Miss Pauling's eyes widen, still lit by the glow of the Australium rock] Engineer: Could be you doin' it. Could be you doin' any damn thing you want. [He picks up the Australium rock and holds it infront of him] Engineer: Nickel's worth of advice? Go find Soldier's cave. Miss Pauling: Yeah...? Engineer: Make sure you mine every last ounce out of it. Make sure you get it all. Put it on a boat. Sail out to the middle of the ocean. And drop it down the deepest trench you can find. [He places the Australium rock back on the table before getting up to leave] Engineer: But it's your call, Flo. [Miss Pauling picks up the Australium rock and stares silently into it as Engineer exits the room] Engineer: If you keep it... I ain't gonna help you. And you oughta know that you won't never be free of it. And I mean maybe really never. Miss Pauling: Engie. [He turns back to see Miss Pauling walking out of the room, visibly shaken] Miss Pauling: You know any deep trenches? [Engineer returns a smile] Engineer: I might know a few. Soldier: ["...and just when we all thought the fridge in the break room was fixed after all..."] ["...it made another brrrddt noise."] ["The Engineer walked back into the room. To fix the fridge? No, he walked right past it. Why?"] ["I'm afraid the answer to that question is a story for another time."] [The scene shifts back to Soldier and Merasmus, now sitting side-by-side tied to chairs, with a blue light overhanging them. Soldier has blood coming from his bottom lip] Soldier: The end. Merasmus: Oh, thank Go— Soldier: Epilogue! The next day, Miss Pauling and the Engineer came and took all of the gold out of my savings cave. And that... is why I had to borrow money from the Korean Mafia in your name. Merasmus: But why did you need that much money? [Soldier pulls out a portrait of the Mann family, his thumb obscuring the middle of the photograph] Soldier: I am glad you asked. It starts with this photo. Merasmus: Wait, your hands are untied? You could have freed us at any time? We're being tortured, Soldier! Soldier: Ha! You call this torture? [The scene pans out to reveal the Korean Mafia around them in a warehouse, as well as Merasmus' abused corpse in a third chair next to Merasmus' ghost, revealing he died during Soldier's story] Mafia Boss: We do call it that, yes. Perhaps there is a language barrier? We are torturing you. We've been torturing your friend while you talked. He's dead now. Soldier: "Dead?" Ha! Merasmus, they can't see you! Quickly! Fireball them before they torture me! Merasmus: Yes! I just need to get my spectral hands out of these astral bindings! Stall them, Soldier! Soldier: You got it! Hey you Koreans! I heard you're terrible at torturing! [Merasmus glances at him in dismay] Merasmus: Soldier! I meant stall them away from torturing you! Soldier: Ah. That is not the rock I just pushed down this hill. Mafia Goon: Who told you this? Our torture style is known throughout the lands! Mafia Boss: Kenzi! Torture this man! [Kenzi — wearing a bloodstained scrub suit, and the Mafia goon — wearing a yellow shirt and pants, begin to approach Soldier and Merasmus] Soldier: Merasmus, hurry! I think they're about to torture somebody! Merasmus: Alllmost... Soldier: You guys are in for some sorcery now! Quick, Merasmus! Unleash hell! Merasmus: Soldier, my ghost hands are still— [Kenzi puts the pliers in Soldier's mouth, grabbing a tooth, while the goon holds Soldier's head back] Soldier: You're embarrassing me in front of my friends, Merasmus. Merasmus: I can't, Soldier. I'm sorr— [Before Merasmus can finish, loud 'WHAM' sounds can be heard as Kenzi pulls out one of Soldier's teeth. The scene changes abruptly to a jungle in the past, as a giant sloth bursts through a stone door with the same 'WHAM' sound] Giant Sloth: ROOOAAAAR! [The view shifts to a young Saxton Hale and Maggie tied to stone pillars, as well as Saxton Hale's former mentor Charles Darling, of whom is wielding an unusual looking horn] Darling: ...it can't be... ...the door of summoning was supposed to trap it... Saxton Hale: Well, it didn't. You've got five seconds before that thing eats all of us! You're first because you're smallest. Then Maggie, then me. [Darling walks behind the stone pillars as he begins to untie them] Darling: Yes. Yes, let me untie y— Saxton Hale: Or maybe he'll break all your bones and save you for later! Eat us first and make you watch! Then he'll eat your limbs! You'll just be a crying stump, Darling. You'd better untie us or— Darling: I am trying to untie you! [Saxton Hale and Maggie both get free, preparing to fight the giant sloth] Darling: There! You're free! Now fix this! Saxton Hale: Stand back, pee wee. Darling: Wait! There's something you must know! Saxton Hale: That's where you're wrong, Darling! There is nothing I need to know! I've got two fists and my best girl! So you just keep quiet back there, and we'll— Maggie: Uh, Sax... Giant Sloth: ROOAAAGH [Suddenly the giant sloth's head and neck light up with orange feathers, and with glowing green eyes fires lasers that destroy the surrounding stone pillars with a loud 'ZZZZARRRPPP' sound, then grabs Darling by the arm] Saxton Hale: Holy hell, that's new. Darling: That's what I've been trying to tell you! This is no normal giant sloth! It's the Megatherium of Mictlan! Protector of the Aztec Underworld! Giant Sloth: ROOAAAR! [Saxton Hale and Maggie group up together] Saxton Hale: Okay, Darling's an idiot and he's summoned a monster from Aztec Hell. What do you think we should do, Mags? Maggie: Well, the way I figure it, Sax... If he blew into that dumb trumpet to bring that thing here... maybe a second toot sends it back! Saxton Hale: Ha! Mags! That's just crazy enough to work! [The giant sloth now holds Darling into the air, as Maggie picks up the horn] Darling: It's not crazy enough! It won't work! You must blow the summoning horn three times in quick succession! Giant Sloth: Rrrr... Maggie: Hey, ugly! Sorry to horn in on— [Darling is now held above the giant sloth, his head now shoved inside of its mouth with a 'GLMMPH' sound] Darling: I wasn't finished! Now that you've gotten the beast's attention, breathe in through your nose while simultaneously pushing air out through your mouth! This is circular breathing! It will produce a continuous drone sound that— Saxton Hale: I've got a better idea! Hey! Monster! How about you swallow that appetizer... Maggie: ...and come get dinner! Darling: Wait! Spit out the appetizer! Voice: ["Sir?"] [The scene changes to Saxton Hale — now with a thick beard — looking up at the head of the giant sloth] Voice: Sir? We need you to sign off on the documents you signed off on yesterday. [The view pans out to reveal Saxton Hale in his office, the giant sloth now a stuffed trophy stationed near him, and Bidwell standing nearby wearing a blue suit, holding stacks of papers. The desk is littered with various bottles and cans] [ Present Day (1979) ] Saxton Hale: I hate this place, Bidwell. Bidwell: Not this again. You got what you wanted, Sir. You got Mann Co back. You sound like Olivia. Saxton Hale: Olivia? Bidwell: Gray Mann's daughter. She took over Mann Co from you. And then you stormed back in seven years ago and took it back. Saxton Hale: Oh right. Whatever happened to her? [The view shifts to reveal Olivia in a small chair and desk next to Saxton Hale's chair and desk. The small desk also has a handful of bottles sitting atop it] Olivia: Still here. Saxton Hale: Ohhhh, right. Sorry, it's hard to see your tiny desk from up here. [She kicks up a leg onto her desk and starts drinking from a bottle] Bidwell: Sir, we really shouldn't be letting her drink. Saxton Hale: Ah, come on, Bidwell. It's just the little airplane bottles. Bidwell: Sir, she's fourteen. Olivia: Why shouldn't I drink, Bidwell? Bidwell: Because you are fourteen. Olivia: Ever since I was a baby, I was part of my stupid Dad's stupid world takeover. I don't want to run a company! I hate it here! [She gets up and approaches one of the many stuffed trophies in Saxton Hale's office] Olivia: All we do is sell guns to stupid morons and sit in this stupid room with all these stupid stuffed animals! Bidwell: Those are Mister Hale's trophies, Olivia. He worked very hard to fight all those— Olivia: Like a billion years ago! Everything in this room is a trophy! If you got a new one, where would you even put it? Saxton Hale: She's right. Olivia? Olivia: What? Saxton Hale: You're fired. [Olivia turns back to face him, her expression shifting from one of frustration to happiness] Olivia: Really? [She runs up to Saxton Hale, of whom is now standing, and gives him a hug. The angle shifts to the open office doors] Saxton Hale: Go live your life. Make your own trophies. [She leaves and walks down the hallway, as Saxton Hale watches behind her with a smile] Bidwell: Sir, she is a child and you are her guardian. You can't let her leave. That's actually illegal. Saxton Hale: Right, I got carried away. Keep an eye on her. Set up a trust. Anything she wants to do. Make sure she can do it. Bidwell? [He puts a hand on Bidwell's shoulder] Bidwell: Sir? Saxton Hale: I'm fired too. Mann Co's yours. Bidwell: Sir, I— I couldn't possibly... Saxton Hale: Alright, your loss. Reddy? [Bidwell freezes up, as Reddy approaches from behind a stuffed bear he was polishing. He is wearing a red suit, and carrying a bucket labelled 'Bear Polish'] Reddy: Yes Sir? Saxton Hale: You own Mann Co now. Reddy: Yes Sir. [Saxton Hale begins to exit the office as Bidwell and Reddy look on] Saxton Hale: Goodbye, Reddy. Reddy: Goodbye, Sir. Saxton Hale: Goodbye, Bidwell. Bidwell: Um. Maybe we could both co-own...? Saxton Hale: You two work out the details. That little girl was right. I need some new trophies. And I know just the gal to help me get 'em. [The scene cuts back to Heavy breaking through the doors of the building Soldier and Merasmus are being held in with a 'SMASH', carrying Sasha with him. He now has a thick black beard] Heavy: RRRRRRRAGGGGHH! Soldier: Oh, hi, Heavy. Look, Merasmus! It's the communist I used to work with. I'm married to his sister. Our story begins in Siberia where a giant hot dog and I tracked— Mafia Boss: Well, aren't we blessed beyond measure. Here I thought we'd only get to torture two Americans today... and now we have three. [A red laser appears on the Mafia Boss' chest, the laser coming from the Sniper's rifle, stationed on an upper floor of the warehouse] Mafia Boss: Ah. I see. Heavy: So. We are at an impasse. Mafia Boss: And I'm afraid it may be too late for negotiation. We've already killed one of your colleagues. [Heavy looks at Merasmus' battered corpse] Heavy: I do not know who that is. Soldier: It's my best friend! Dead Merasmus! [Heavy puts his hand to his chin as he recollects his memories] Heavy: Oohhhh. This is the old witch woman who tried to kill us on Halloween for many years. I remember now. [His face returns to a neutral expression] Heavy: I do not care. Mafia Boss: Ah! We don't either. Excellent. What we care about is this one. The one who is not dead. He owes us 12,000 won. Nobody leaves until the debt is cleared. Heavy: 12,000 won. That is... seventeen U.S. dollars. You captured these men from a maximum security prison, flew them to Gwangju and tortured them to death... for seventeen dollars. Mafia Boss: Naturally. We have a reputation to consider. If the Korean Mafia would do all that for seventeen dollars... ...imagine what our enemies believe we would do for real money. [Heavy pulls out his wallet] Heavy: Can you break a twenty? [The Mafia Boss also pulls out a wallet] Mafia Boss: Hmm... I cannot. It seems we are once again at an impa— Heavy: Just keep it. [Soldier, now free from his chair, begins to leave] Soldier: Okay, Merasmus, I have to go now. Have fun haunting this Korean drug factory. Merasmus: What? No! Soldier, don't leave me here! Soldier: What do you want me to do? You got killed here, Merasmus. Now you've got to haunt it for all time. I don't make the rules. It's ghost law. [Merasmus grabs a brick and holds it up] Merasmus: Wait! I could haunt this brick! Here! Put it in your pocket! [Soldier takes the brick, turning to Kenzi, of whom is packing his tools and preparing to leave] Soldier: Hey, guy who tortured me. Can I have this brick? Kenzi: Are you going to hit me with it? Soldier: I don't think so. Kenzi: Then sure. [Soldier places the brick Merasmus has begun to haunt in his back pocket] Soldier: There. But now we're even. Merasmus: Even? Soldier, you broke into my home and killed Tom Jones! Then you framed me for the murder! Then let me rot in a jail cell for seven years! Then let me get tortured and killed by the Korean Mafia! HOW ON EARTH ARE WE EVEN? Soldier: Tell you what. Why don't we go grab a brick from your house I burned down after I killed Tom Jones. Merasmus: You burned down my house? Soldier: I was wanted for murder, Merasmus. Stay with me here. Son, I'm saying we can go back to your house and grab a brick... ...and you and Tom Jones can both live in my pants forever. Whataya say? [Merasmus stares at him with a mildly irritated expression as they leave, with Heavy and Sniper waiting for Soldier to catch up] Merasmus: Alright, fine. Soldier: Good, that's settled. Now let's get out of here before someone sees me. I'm wanted in Korea for murder. [The scene changes to Spy in a coat and scarf standing infront of a mailbox, with the surnames 'Willis-Mitchell', 'Willis-Graham', and 'Willis-Gibson' on the side — most of the names striked out, with only the last 'Willis' left unstriked. Spy takes out a letter from the full mailbox, addressed from the city of Teufort, NM to 'Jeremy Willis' of 10027 Lynn Street, Boston, MA] [ One week later. ] [Spy makes his way towards the door of the house, where he's greeted by Scout and four children. Scout is wearing a jumper and has grown longer hair] Scout: Hey-y-y-y! Look who it is, kids! Spy: Hello, Jeremy. [Spy enters, hanging his coat on a rack next to the door. The house is thoroughly decorated thoroughly with festive ornaments. Various family photographs are hung up on the hallway walls depicting Scout, his children, and his mother] Spy: I apologize. Am I early? Scout: Nah! I mean, you're the first one here, so a little. But this is the first one of these we've ever done, so I say you're right on time. Come on in! Spy: Oh my goodness. So many children. These are all yours? Scout: Hell yeah they are. My boys can swim. My girls too. We all just got back from the pool. Guys! Go take those swimsuits off, you're gettin' water everywhere! [They enter a living room, with stockings hung above a fireplace and a Christmas tree in the corner, bent over due to it being too tall for the room] Spy: Is... your wife home? Scout: Them? Nah. None of them deadbeats are in the picture currently. I'm raisin' these on my own. Spy: Yes, but how? You can't possibly have a job. We don't officially exist. I burned your fingerprints off myself. Scout: Psh That's easy. I sued the city! Spy: You sued... [Scout lifts his jumper, revealing many stitches and scars, as well as a Tom Jones tattoo] Scout: The city of Teufort! I broke my leg like six times out there, my arm about a dozen, like thirty concussions. I don't even think I've got kidneys anymore. Or maybe I got too many? Point is, I know I look good, but trust me, I'm a mess on the inside. They owe me! Spy: We were murdering people out there. For years. Scout: I know! That's how I broke my arm! Voice: Daddy! Daddy! [They turn to face one of Scout's children — a little girl with a pink sparkling skirt — holding up a broken tiara] Scout: What is it, Tanya? Tanya: Tommy broke my tiara! I can't be a princess now! Spy: Tanya, hello. Tanya: Who are you? Spy: I am your... [He hesitates, then smiles] Spy: Father's friend. From work. Tanya, do you know what is even better than a princess? Tanya: What? [He takes off his mask, then gives it to Tanya, of whom responds with an excited expression] Spy: A princess assassin. [Tanya puts on the mask — too big for her head — and runs around excitedly. Spy's face is revealed for the first time, showing him with dark hair and a light stubble] Spy: You have a lovely family, Jeremy. Scout: Thanks! You should come by more often, you're great with 'em! Hold on, I think they're here! [Scout goes to the front door, where he is greeted by Demoman, his mother and the Eyelander. Further down the street Soldier and Zanya can be seen as their children run across the front yard, as well as Heavy's sisters and mother exiting a van. Sniper's camper van can also be seen parked on the road] [The scene changes to inside, as Heavy comes through the frontdoor with a large wrapped-up turkey. Multiple pictures taken through the day are shown, with a photo of Sniper removing his glasses, a photo of Pyro watching the fire with Scout's children, a photo of Medic's chimpanzee, Archimedes and the Dalmation from the Maws & Paws animal hospital, a photo showing Heavy holding up the turkey with a label reading 'Bonk Farms' 'This MegaTurkey™ Courtesy of Ms. P', a photo showing Spy smoking while holding a wine glass and looking at one of Scout's hung-up pictures, and Scout coughing after having a drink, as Ms. DeGroot slaps his back and Heavy's mother laughs] [Suddenly, the doorbell rings with a 'DING DONG' sound as Scout goes to answer] Scout: You guys go ahead and start, I'll be right there! [The view changes to the reader's point-of-view as Scout opens the door with a smile] Scout: Oh hey! It's YOU! Get in here, you big dummy. [They enter the house] Scout: Nah, we're just startin'! I even saved ya a seat. [The reader walks alongside Scout down the hallway] Scout: Y'know... I'm real glad you could make it. We've been through a lot, you and us. And I... well, it's good to know you stuck around, after everything we've been through. [He glances back from the entrance of the dining room] Scout: Alright, c'mon, let's eat before this gets embarrassin'. Miss Pauling bought us a turkey! But just remember... [They both enter the dining room with Scout pulling out a chair, the table filled with plates of sandwiches and the roast turkey surrounded by the mercs, their family members, pets and friends. In the background the words 'Merry Smissmas' are hung up] Scout: ["We couldn't have done any of this without you."] [The scene changes to Saxton Hale and Maggie stanced up in a field surrounded by cheetahs. They're now visibly much older, both with completely grey hair, and Saxton Hale's chest hair now barely visible. His hat can be seen in one of the cheetah's mouths] [ The African Veldt. Now. ] Saxton Hale: Ha! We're really in for it now, Mags! Fist-fighting all these cheetahs managed to attract more cheetahs! [Maggie punches one of the cheetahs in the face, sending its teeth flying, as Saxton Hale pulls his hat back out of one of the cheetah's mouths before putting it back on] Maggie: Looks like we're either gonna have to fight 'em all, Sax... or jump off this cliff. Saxton Hale: What's the matter, Mags... [The view zooms out to show even more cheetahs surrounding them, with only a cliff behind them. The sun begins to set in the background] Saxton Hale: You wanna live forever? THE END