User:Real (real)

and i’m avery the coolest. peace ya’ll ✌️😎
Basic information
Type:	goofball supreme (death incarnate)
Gender:	male (he/they)
Health:	150
Speed:	90%
Native language:	english, german
Team Fortress 2
Favourite classes:	Heavy
Favourite maps:	2Fort, Well (CTF)
Favourite weapons:	Ham Shank, Sandvich
Favourite hats:	Big Chief, Pip-Boy
Contact information

Hello. I’m Avery. Mr. Inconsistent, as some may know me. This is my page. Why are you here?

I’m a dude from the great state of Pennsylvania who like stuff that only idiots would like. I’m a big fan of Feed Me Jack. I began playing TF2 once when my friend kept begging me to download it so she’d have someone to play it with. Chances are, as you’re reading this, I’m probably j****** ** **** right now.

about me

I started playing Team Fortress 2 in February 2021.

But I haven’t touched TF2 since August of 2022. The laptop I used to play on hasn’t been doing all that well. Since then, I’ve picked up a love for music of all kinds (except reggaeton) and I’m just a dude who likes music now. Nothing special.

I haven’t been very active on the wiki in a while, too. You know what I have been active on? A little website called albumoftheyear.org. You can catch me posting a lot of reviews there.

Other than all that, I played a lot of Heavy, specifically with the Hibernating Bear set (which, by the way, is actually super good).

my crazy conspiracy theory about bo en’s “Pale Machine”

PLEASE NOTE!: I wrote this a while back for a school blog, and figured I should put it here for no reason other than it’s long and cool.

“Have you ever heard Pale Machine by bo en? No? Oh. Have you ever played Omori? Still no? Uh… well… uh… Let me give you a bit of an introduction, I guess.

Long ago, in the faraway year of 2013, almost 10 years ago as of today, an English pop artist would release his debut album under Maltine records, that album being Pale Machine. It was the first ever Kawaii Future Bass music of its kind, and was big inspiration for artists who later picked up the genre like Snail’s House. Calum Bowen, stage name bo en, would later go on to work on a bunch of other different projects, mostly video game ost’s under his real name. In the past, he worked from 2013 - 2014, and through 2019 to the present(?) on soundtracks like Pikuniku (Original Soundtrack). He even worked with Omocat and Slime Girls on the OMORI [Original Soundtrack], even going so far as to contribute one of his full songs (albeit in a different mix) from Pale Machine to the soundtrack, his song My Time.

But where am I going with this? Well, I’m actually going to get a little personal with this entry, as this is a special one. This is our 10th edition! So I decided to talk about a topic that is very special to me and explain something that I have seen NO ONE ON THE WHOLE INTERNET talk about. I’m really excited to go through this with you.



To begin with, I discovered this project back in 2020 and was in awe of the unique production style and pretty melodies used throughout the album. I used to listen to this all the time, it’s only a short 20 minute listen, but so much is packed into it.

You see, sometime late last year, I was just laying in my bed relistening to the project when I realized something. When I got to My Time and really began paying attention to the lyrics, it all clicked. This is my little conspiracy theory. Soon, it all suddenly begins making sense. Pale Machine symbolizes life. I know I might sound crazy, but hear me out, let me go through this song by song. I’ll also be including the 2 original songs from the expansion pack later down the line. Beginning, of course, with the intro.





1. Intro - This intro is pretty simple, a small snippet of a string orchestra as the track transitions to the next. The strings, compared to when this motif shows up again, are much higher and rugged. This track, in the grand scheme of things, is probably about being born. 



2. Miss You - This track is much more of an appropriate opening track, this shows off that signature production that is so unique to this album. Based on the lyrics, I think this song is meant to represent growing up and learning about everything. The spouting during Calum’s singing part, especially the Japanese phrase “これから一所懸命頑張ります” which translates to “I will do my best.” This just kinda proves the whole thing about learning and growing up. Easy peasy.



3. Be Okay - The majority of these lyrics are in Japanese, and looking back and translating it, it looks to me like those Japanese lyrics are the most important. Going through and translating them, it seems to me that the song is about reassurance, overcoming problems and staying happy throughout. Going through in order, the first verse is presenting the dread. See here (translations will be in brackets [ ] ):

“問題があるんだね [There’s a problem]
(Feelings are so)
ドキドキ怖そうだね [It sounds scary]
(And now today is yesterday)
何しましょうかな [What should I do?]
聞いて聞いて [Listen, listen] as I say”

Taking this in, this first verse is presenting the problem and the struggle, asking how to go about it. Well, listen as he says in the next lyrics (the translations here are a bit rougher):

“困ったら [If you are in trouble]
思い出  [Memory]
について [about]
思って [I thought to(?)]
いつでも [Anytime]
大丈夫ね [It’s okay]
安心して [Rest assured]
My love”

Being told (supposedly by a parent) that everything is gonna be alright in the end. After looking at just this one verse, everything becomes pretty clear.



4. Every Day - I, uh… sorry, I just don’t know what this what is supposed to be about. This is the only one that I can say I have nothing for. There are so little lyrics here that I can’t figure out what this one is. Here are the lyrics:

“毎日散歩する欲しいな [I want to take a walk everyday]

でも洞窟にいる [But I’m stuck in a cave]

And after all there's something perfectly clear
In this life you must endure
Stick with me you'll find your purpose is near
And it's far
It won't matter anymore”

If any of that made any sense to you, comment and let me know what you think. I’m all out of ideas.



5. Friend - Take a wild guess what you think this song is about. Go on.  What’s that? You said it’s about making friends and finding comfort in their friendship? Ding ding ding ding ding! We have a winner! But in truth, there’s actually a lot more to this song than what may seem. Take this intro, for example:

“トモダチ [Friend] make my dream come true
この感じめちゃまごまご [This feeling is so messed up]
And you've never even felt this way before, I know”

If you ask me, the way I interpret this is that this but here is talking about the different feelings that one can feel when with friends. How they may act differently. Here are the next lines:

“On the boundary between me and you
Some fluidity shapes me through and through”

I believe that this is meant to be a reference to the fact that friends are influential to the way we act, our personality, and see the world, as well as how most people have different sides of themselves that they show to certain people. The next last verse is odd, though…

“Show me something that you can do
I'll enjoy myself, I'll be eating you”

On the genius annotation, someone mentions how they don’t think that this is about the cannibal kind, physically eating someone, but that this is about eating… up their presence. Which, y’know, is a pretty viable option. Not the craziest thing Calum has done. That about wraps up Friend, it’s a song about friends, big whoop.



6. Winter Valentine - This song is an odd one for sure. Obviously, this song is about finding love. There’s not really much more to it. The premise of the song is longing for someone who you love. That’s kinda it. Personally my least favorite song.



7. Pale Machine - Here we are, the title track at last! This one can be assumed to be about settling down with your loved one and living life. This second verse makes it pretty clear:

“Good morning, how's the weather dear?
My feelings are so clear
I just wanna be with you
Doing what you do, always
Show me how to live”

This line alone makes the message of this song pretty clear. Living life to the fullest with their husband/wife/loved one and enjoying every minute of it. Knowing how much they love each other. Later in the song, though, it looks like the two eventually have a child? 

“I'm born anew, my fingers push the buttons
Thoughts come through now
赤ちゃんみたい  [Like a baby]
ママさまがいっぱいでしょ [Mama is full]”

Everything seems good in the family’s life now. Until the next song.



8. My Time - Just look at these next lyrics.

“Close your eyes, you'll be here soon
一 二 三 四 五分 [1, 2, 3, 4, 5 minutes]
時々 本当に寝たい [Sometimes I want to go to sleep]
でも このワードできない [But I can’t say these words]”

This song represents death.  Closing your eyes. “Here” represents the afterlife. So far, we are met with our character, and he is dying. He knows he’s dying. And I guess “these words” are meant to be these next lyrics:

“おやすみ [Goodnight]
おやすみ [Goodnight]
おやすみ [Goodnight]
おやすみ [Goodnight]”

He knows he is about to die and fears his death. Everything throughout his life will be lost to him. He does not want that and does not want to die. He can’t say these words. The time passes and he is left fearing his death at any moment:

“Hands of time will wring my neck
Every little moment spells regret
But I don't have to feel this way
As a voice inside my head”

He is filled with regret over all the bad things he did and all the opportunities he missed. This voice inside his head keeps telling him that his time (like the name of the song, My Time,) has come. Repeating おやすみ [goodnight]. These next lyrics add onto that:

“おやすみ おやすみ [Goodnight, goodnight]
Close your eyes and you'll leave this dream
おやすみ おやすみ [Goodnight, goodnight]
I know that it's hard to do”

Better yet, right at the end of the song, the same strings as in the intro come in again… but lower and softer now.

To close this chapter, even further adding to the “death” theme, remember when I told you about Omori? SPOILER WARNING, BUT THIS SONG IS USED IN AN ENDING WHEN THE MAIN CHARACTER JUMPS OFF THE ROOF OF A BUILDING AND DIES. I had to look that up because I’ve never played Omori, but now if I ever do my experience will be ruined. You’re welcome, I don’t think you’ll need any more proof. Now, onto the expansion pack.







+1. Money Won’t Pay - This song is one of the only ones worth mentioning in the expansion pack, because more than half of the tracks are just remixes. This track seems to be about our character getting himself a job. I don’t know if he really likes his work though.

“It's hard
When you're staying way past 5
Every single night
For some crazy deadline
And we're all so confined by the need

To always make ends meet
'Cos if you're not earning
You could end up on the street
And that's no place to live”

This song talks a lot about how middle-class jobs are bullshark. Constantly worried that you might not be able to pay rent, so you have to word hard and waste your life away at 7 part-times at once. But check this out:

“Money won't pay to dance the night away
So forget the rent and get on down
Working all day, you sure deserve a raise
So let's spin the beat and get higher”

Well, he says the, even if the job gets hard, you gotta make time and learn to have some fun too. That’s about it for this song. Onto the next!



+2. I’ll Fall - This song is another from the expansion pack. If you ask me, this one is my least favorite out of these two I’m mentioning, but it’s still a really catchy song. This one is about a breakup. Pretty easy. Check this: 

“Did you know
You were the apple of my eye when I was 17
Did you even stop to
Think that life would change
From when you're 17”

That about sums it up: high school sweetheart being too attached to someone who has already moved on. Easy peasy. 





We are officially done! Finally! We did it! You now know about my crazy conspiracy theory that Pale Machine is a concept album about the lifetime of one person. This is my longest blog yet, and it’s special because my 10th blog is about an album that turns a decade old this year (this September, specifically). Overall, this album is really special to me and I love it so much. It makes me very happy to be writing this. I had a lot of fun and I hope you did too! 

Basic rundown would be that… a dude is born, grows up happily and learns about his surroundings, has a good upbringing, learns to get around, gets a job, finds true love, settles down, and dies. And whatever Every Day is. I’ve seen nobody on all the internet talk about this connection, and I just felt the need to get it out there. 

If you have ANY IDEA what Every Day is about, PLEASE let me know!

Anyways, thanks for reading. Tune in next time for some more bias from yours truly.”

cool user boxes but there used to be like 80 here where did they all go

This user says, "Correcting your grammar is a full-time job, now."

This user wears hats in real life while playing Team Fortress 2!

This user owns a Genuine Pip-Boy.

This user is American, pardner!

This User Page Is Garbage!

epic

John Spinach