Meet the Soldier

Meet the Soldier
Video Info
Released:	August 22, 2007
Run time:	1:27

"Meet the Soldier" Video Transcript

Transcript

The word "Soldier" below refers to the protagonist, a RED Soldier. [Cut to a BLU Pyro firing a blast of flame from its Flamethrower. The Pyro thrusts its weapon in the air and laughs triumphantly as a rocket heads towards it from off screen]. Pyro: [Rocket hits Pyro, who is gibbed.] "Owh!" [Cut to BLU Demoman taking a drink, also getting blown up by a rocket from off screen.] [Cut to BLU Heavy performing the Showdown taunt.] Heavy: "Pow!" [Is hit by a crit rocket, explodes] ["Meet the Soldier" text appears.] [Cut to the Soldier, drilling what appears to be a line of recruits.] Soldier: "'If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight!' Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little more [He pokes a recruits' helmet] about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor." [The Art of War plays] [Cut to the Soldier holding his Shovel and screaming.] [The Soldier then charges the final capture point in Granary with his Shotgun and kills a Demoman, who fires at him but misses. He switches to his Rocket Launcher and a BLU Medic appears behind him, firing syringes.] RED Demoman: "To the left!" Soldier: "Maggots!" [The Soldier turns to the left and fires a Crit rocket at the Medic, gibbing him.] RED Sniper: "Right up! Right up!" RED Heavy: "Go, go, go!" [The Soldier, Sniper and Heavy charge into battle together, as explosions occur all around them.] [Cut back to the Soldier's drill. Music pauses.] Soldier: "Then, he used his fight money... [The Soldier unhooks two grenades from his belt, one in each hand.] Soldier: ...to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat... [The Soldier demonstrates by using the grenades, moving them in a walking motion.] Soldier: ...and then he beat the crap out of every single one." [The Soldier bangs the two grenades together repeatedly.] [Cut back to battle scene. Music resumes.] RED Scout: (Behind cover) "Sentry up there!" [The Soldier runs up to the Sentry gun and rocket jumps onto a pipe, both destroying the Sentry and killing the Engineer in the process.] [A BLU Heavy and Pyro are holding the final capture point. The Heavy is laughing gleefully. The Soldier jumps downward, firing a Critical rocket that lands just before he does. The explosion kills both the Heavy and Pyro. A Spy uncloaks and attempts to backstab the Soldier, but the Soldier pulls out his Shovel, swiftly knocking out the Spy with it.] [Freeze frame] [Cut back to the Soldier's drill] Soldier: [Laughs to himself] "And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a 'zoo'!" [Crickets chirp as the 'recruits' are revealed to be the gibbed heads of BLU team members perched on a gate, all wearing BLU Soldier helmets. The Medic's head falls off the gate.] [Team Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays.] Soldier: [To the Medic's head] "Unless it's a farm!"

Notes

• The title card displays "COPYRIGHT LOLOLOL" on the bottom right corner, a recurring joke throughout the Meet the Team videos.

• The Soldier's helmet appears to have a slight dent in it, visible when he is talking to the heads on the fence, that is not in the actual game model.

• Sun Tzu was an honorific title bestowed upon Template:W (c. 544 BC–496 BC), the author of Template:W, an immensely influential ancient Chinese book on military strategy.
  • The quote the Soldier recites at the beginning of the video is from chapter 10 of The Art of War.

• The Art of War track first played in this video. The track was later released as a part of the Team Fortress 2 Soundtrack.

• The video uses a modified version of Granary. The RED team goes completely around the building that connects the first and second control points into an area that is normally a dead end.

• Throughout the video, the critical hit sound is heard, despite the Soldier firing normal rockets.

• Before rocket-jumping up onto the pipe, the Soldier manages to kill the Engineer and destroy his Sentry Gun in one hit, despite critical hits dealing no additional damage to buildings.

• When the Soldier hits the Spy in the face with his Shovel, the poster on the wall in the background reads "No Smoking".

• In the final scene, the decapitated Spy head is missing a tooth, meaning that this is the head of the earlier Spy that the Soldier hit in the face with his Shovel.
  • However, the Spy still has a cigarette in his mouth despite it being knocked out at the exact same time as his tooth.

• At the end, when the BLU Medic's severed head falls off the fence, there is a generic bone in place of an exposed spinal column in his neck.

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