A Smissmas Story
| A Smissmas Story | |
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| Comic Strip Info | |
| Released: | December 14, 2011 |
| Number of pages: | 14 |
| “ | I am Old Nick! The SPIRIT of Australian Christmas. And I have come for your children.
— Old Nick
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A Smissmas Story is a comic released on December 14, 2011, to coincide with the release of Australian Christmas 2011.
Contents
Synopsis
The story opens with a scene of a plump businessman named Archibald wearing a bowler delightedly discovering a ticking bomb upon the doorstep of his "Bombs for the Poor" non-profit charity. He calls his friend Julius to inspect the bomb, states that some good Samaritan has left it there, and Julius declares that the people of Teufort (2Fort) will rejoice. After the two note the lack of any information of the sender, a stern voice cuts the story off. A severe judge looks at the BLU Scout, seriously doubting the veracity of his testimony. When the Scout checks with his legal counsel, who happen to be the BLU Soldier and Spy, the Spy has slammed his head onto the table, but the Soldier gives an affirmative 'thumbs-up'. The Scout sticks to his story, and the judge presents evidence that the bomb destroyed a Mall Santa training facility. When the judge mentions that the Scout has yet to give any names, (meaning he would be sentenced solely), the Scout quickly accuses the Soldier of being the mastermind of the plot, upon which the Soldier begins strangling him. The judge wearily sentences all three to community service at a mall, hosting a "Meet Santa!" event.
A single mother approaches the resentful Scout (dressed as an elf) and asks about the wait to meet Santa. The Scout immediately begins flirting with her, but sends her to the back of the line when he realizes she has a husband. The Scout monitors the two lines behind him, one for single moms and the other for everyone else. A boy named Jack with a bowl cut begins listing what he wants to the Soldier, who is dressed up as Santa. The Soldier rejects all of his desires and instead gives him a military haircut. When the boy's father intervenes, the Soldier prepares to beat him up. As they fight, the Spy is on a phone pleading with Miss Pauling to help release them. Miss Pauling wants to hear how the Soldier became a public defender, and the Spy dismisses it with a reminder that a magician is the Soldier's roommate, and claims that everything is fine.
Suddenly, Old Nick arrives with a sleigh pulled by a pack of aggressive reindeer and a kangaroo. He proclaims his intent to kidnap the children, and Miss Pauling angrily orders the Spy to take care of matters. When Jack fearfully walks up to the Spy, the Spy bestows the child with an icicle snapped off from the edge of the pay phone. The Spy instructs the boy to obey every action of his plan. Meanwhile, Old Nick is occupied, fighting the Scout and Soldier. The Scout hits him with a roll of wrapping paper, and the Soldier bludgeons him using a Saxton Hale action figure. Jack appears before Old Nick, who quickly recovers and grabs the boy. The Scout warns Old Nick that the boy is more than he seems, as Jack quickly takes out the icicle and stabs Old Nick in the neck.
Old Nick crumples to the floor, and the Scout congratulates the Spy, assuming he had disguised as the boy. However, the Spy is actually with the media, proclaiming the Scout and Soldier are heroes who saved the children of Teufort. The Scout boasts about how he's used to being a hero, while the Soldier is happy about discovering the "War on Smissmas". The comic ends with Jack reminiscing with the Spy about his experience with stabbing Old Nick, and decides that he isn't afraid anymore. The Spy congratulates the boy and wishes him a merry Smissmas. A front page of a newspaper has an image which shows the Scout flirting with Jack's mother, the Soldier grinning as he assists the battered father to stand up, and the Spy giving Jack a piggyback ride. The headline declares that the mercenaries have been issued a pardon for defeating a supposedly-mythical holiday mascot.
Pages
Page 1
Page 2
Page 3
Page 4
Page 5
Page 6
Page 7
Page 8
Page 9
Page 10
Page 11
Page 12
Page 13
Page 14
Trivia
- The first page of the comic is based upon the front cover of The Saturday Evening Post.
- The "Action Hale Action Figure", a popular Steam Workshop submission, makes an appearance.
- The Lorem Ipsum filler text appears as the tiny "text" of the news paper at the end of the comic.
- The quote "The power of Smissmas compels you!" is a reference to the popular quote "The Power of Christ compels you!" from the movie The Exorcist.
- Though the Bombinomicon comic claims Merasmus the Magician is the RED Soldier's roommate, the BLU Spy tells Miss Pauling over the phone in this comic that the BLU Soldier's roommate is a magician as well.
See also
External links
- A Smissmas Story on the TF2 Official Website.
- Blog post that accompanied the announcement of the A Smissmas Story comic on the TF2 Official Website.
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