Non-player characters

Non-player characters are those characters in the Team Fortress 2 setting which are not one of the nine playable classes. While most are uninvolved in gameplay (with the exception of the Administrator and the Ghost of Zepheniah Mann), they still add extra background to the Team Fortress 2 setting.

Individuals

The Administrator

See Administrator.

Blutarch and Redmond Mann

Blutarch Mann and Redmond Mann are the sons of Zepheniah Mann. They are the owners of BLU and RED, respectively. The two sons have been engaged a lifelong feud with each other over the control of the vast lands left to them by their father. After Zepheniah Mann's death, both Blutarch and Redmond hired a team of 9 mercenaries to quickly defeat the other sibling, taking control of his lands. As their forces were evenly matched, the situation quickly devolved into a protracted stalemate, leading both Blutarch and Redmond to look to Radigan Conagher for a life-extending machine, each brother hoping to outlive the other, as neither could win the battle by using brute force.

• Blutarch Mann.png

  Blutarch Mann at his desk circa 1960.

• Redmond Mann 1850.jpg

  Redmond Mann in 1850.

• 

  Blutarch Mann in 1850.

Trivia

• The image of Blutarch, with the electricity seeping from his eyes may be a reference to the 'Manly Angry Avatars' fad. The TF2 Community partook in the fad a few months ago and created some impressive images. These images were inspired by a number of Valve member's avatars at the time.

• Manlyangry blutarch.png

  Blutarch after a shock to bring him back to life

• Manlyangry heavy.png

  A 'Manly Angry' Heavy

BLU Scout's Mother

The BLU Scout's Mother

“

BLU Scout: "What're you? President of his fan-club?" BLU Spy: "No... that would be your mother!" — Meet the Spy

”

The Scout's Mother is briefly mentioned and shown in Meet the Spy. She raised the Scout and his seven "mad-dog" brothers in South Boston and somehow, still managed to keep her figure. She is in a romantic relationship with the RED Spy who lovingly calls her 'ma petite chou-fleur' (French, lit. 'My little cauliflower', although a more accurate English translation would be 'My sweetheart'). The BLU Scout was apparently shocked to learn of this relationship, though his actual feelings on the matter are unknown as he was in fact the RED Spy disguised as the BLU Scout at the time. The Scout's Mom wears a classic late 60's style dress and hairstyle. In her photo appearance, she wears only blue clothing, so it could be assumed that the RED Scout's mother probably wears red in theme with her son's team color as well. Seven compromising photos of her and the RED Spy are kept in a top secret file labeled 'Scout's Mom' in the BLU base. She is notably the only female character yet to be modeled, assuming the Pyro is male. The Spy had a likeness of her engraved on the barrel of the Ambassador.

Mrs. DeGroot

Mrs. DeGroot

“

Yer da walked fifteen miles in the rain to blow up the Queen of England for a Nickel! — Demoman's Mother on the Family Trade

”

The Demoman's Mother, Mrs. DeGroot, is a blind, elderly woman who reminisces constantly about the Demoman's late father. Even with her son's multi-million dollar salary and mansion, she still thinks he does not work hard enough, claiming that the Demoman's Father would be spinning in his grave at his idleness and had 26 jobs. She insisted on bringing up the Demoman Scottish, and does not like to see him "squandering his gifts."

She, along with the Demoman's father, collected the young Tavish from the Crypt Grammar School for Orphans, revealing themselves as his true parents. They explained that he was abandoned at birth until his skills manifested themselves, a longstanding, cruel, and wholly unnecessary tradition among the Highland Demolition Men.

Elizabeth

Elizabeth

“

Who I am does not concern you. — Elizabeth

”

Elizabeth, or Emily whose last name is unknown was Zepheniah Mann's hand servant. Upon his death, he left her the majority of his estate, including deeds, accounts and debts. In the Loose Canon comic, Elizabeth convinced Radigan to construct two Life Extender Machines, not only the single one for Blutarch as originally requested. Elizabeth bribed Radigan with Australium. It is unknown how she obtained one hundred pounds of the element. It is assumed that Elizabeth is of some relation to Helen, as they have very similar appearances.

Gentle Manne of Leisure

The Gentle Manne of Leisure and his Companione

“

A-ha-ha! You are as PRESUMPTUOUS as you are POOR and IRISH. Tarnish notte the majesty of my TOWER of HATS. — The Gentle Manne of Leisure

”

The Gentle Manne of Leisure is an English Victorian, who is rich enough to buy a tower of hats. He goes around and tells the peasants they are poor and Irish. He travels around the streets with his companion. The Gentle Manne of Leisure walks around with a tuxedo, a cane, and his most prized possession; his tower of hats.

He was first shown and referenced in the Classless Update.

Kicasso

Dell looking on at an original Kicasso

“

Say, uh... That ain't an original Kicasso, is it? — Dell Conagher (The Engineer)

”

A painter whose work is on display in the lobby of BLU's headquarters, and recognized by Dell Conagher. Went through a "Hunted in the Jungle" period of artwork. Most likely a reference to the obscure short movie by the same name, as well as a play on the name of the famous artist, Picasso.

Miss Pauling

File:Miss Pauling.jpg

Miss Pauling

“

Miss Pauling: You know, forgetting for a minute that we don't condone friendship, it's sort of... Almost.... Uh... Reprehensible. Totally and completely reprehensible. The Administrator: We are in agreement, Miss Pauling. — 'The Administrator'

”

Miss Pauling is a loyal assistant to the the Administrator. She performs a number of duties including reporting unusual background checks, ordering and delivery of goods and opening communication channels. It was during a routine background check that Miss Pauling discovered the RED Demoman and BLU Soldier's friendship, which she then brought to the Administrator's attention. Miss Pauling generally complies with her employer's views for fear of incurring her wrath, even if she does not necessarily agree with them. When pressed by the Administrator on what exactly friends do, her reply was "Um. Go skating...look at gun catalogs....sometimes we just talk..." She insists the Administrator is "not so bad when you get to know her."

Under the Administrator's orders, she personally delivered a number of highly volatile custom-order Mann Co. weapons to the Soldier and Demoman in exchange for separately agreeing to kill one another.

Poopy Joe

Poopy Joe - "Taken too soon"

Poopy Joe was a monkey astronaut who tragically died in an explosion before taking off, caused by Mann Co. in their unsuccessful attempt to rid themselves of weapons involved in a Senate investigation. Mann Co. takes no blame for his death and created commemorative plates that remember Poopy Joe and America's dream of conquering space. These plates were actually hints of the upcoming War! Update at the time, depicting the Eyelander, the Equalizer and the Buff Banner's bugle.

• Pickaxeplate.png

  The plate depicting the Equalizer

• Swordplate.png

  The plate depicting the Eyelander

• Trumpetplate.png

  The plate depicting the Buff Banner's bugle.

Radigan Conagher

Radigan Conagher

“

"...Alright" — Radigan Conagher on monster-building-requests

”

Radigan Conagher is the Grandfather of the Engineer. He was hired by Blutarch Mann to build a machine to extend his life past his brother's. He agrees to build the machine for Blutarch. Later on he is approached by a woman, who bears a similar appearance to that of The Administrator. She offers him Australium to build Blutarch's Machine, but also offers that he build Redmond's machine with the same materials.

Later on in the present day, the machine Radigan had built for Blutarch has broken down and gives the Engineer the plans for the machine to repair it. Along with the plans for the Life Extender Machine are Plans for Guns and Australium Map caches, and he commands the Engineer to only repair the Life Extender Machine, not to build anything else he finds. The Engineer is then seen in the last panel with a mischievous expression.

He appears in the Loose Canon comic.

Saxton Hale

See Saxton Hale.

Shakespearicles

Shakespearicles, the strongest writer who ever lived

Shakespearicles was the strongest writer who ever lived. He was the inventor of the two-storey building, the stage play, America and the Rocket Launcher. Despite his powerful grasp of language and the ability to bench press 700 British pounds, several inventions eluded his iron grip—most tragically among them, stairs.

For the next three hundred years, people who needed to get to the second floor used the only method available to them, which was rocket jumping. This persisted until 1857, when the young bearded inventor named President Abraham Lincoln invented stairs.

He was first referenced in the WAR! Update.

Trent and Jessica

File:TrentJessica.jpg

Trent and Jessica

“

...and the bullets biodegrade once they hit flesh, leaving nothing behind but a blog post. — Trent explaining Apple's advances in the minigun market

”

Trent and Jessica are two young fellows (and, according to the Soldier, hippies) who work at the Apple store located just outside Dustbowl.

They offered items for sale to the RED Scout and Heavy, specifically a very small looking, yet identical headset for the Scout, and a white, black, and blue Minigun whose bullets add kills to the user's killcount on his blog. (If the user does not have a blog, the gun is programmed to create one.) They also managed to impress the RED Soldier by instantly cooking a pig with a device plugged through a firewire port. Jessica also explained Apple's newest product, the iBlewupthemoon, to Saxton Hale, impressing him and leading him to attempt to purchase the company.

Groups

Australians

Australians in the 1890's

“

Every one of mankind's innovations now comes from the lager-pickled brain of an Australian. — Emily on the moustache-sporting, beer-swilling, deathray-inventing Australians

”

One thought of as nation of idiots, since 1850 Australians have become world leaders in technology, with every innovation, including cloaking and teleportation, coming from the lager-loving nation. By the 1890's, Sydney had become a city of tomorrow, with flying cars, giant airships and self-grooming moustaches. Much like their national hero, Saxton Hale, every man, woman and child in the nation of Australia sports a glorious, full moustache. Emily, an ancestor of The Administrator, theorised that the nation's incredible intelligence came from the rare element, Australium, a theory that seemed to prove true, once it amplified Radigan Conagher's intelligence to phenomenal levels.

BLU Team (Original)

BLU, circa 1850

“

...I assembled a team of the world's deadliest mercenaries to take it all by force. What I did not expect was that my idiot brother would do the same. — Blutarch Mann on the original BLU team

”

The original BLU team was assembled by Blutarch Mann in the 1850's in an attempt to claim all of the land bequeathed to him and his brother, Redmond, by their father. Unfortunately for Blutarch, it appears that the original RED team was assembled at the same time, leaving both siblings at a stalemate. The original team consisted of the same nine classes as the current organization. The Scout (Henry McCarty) took on the appearance of a young cowboy, complete with spurred boots. The Soldier (Stonewall Jackson) dressed like a member of the Confederate Army, utilising a rifle, rather than a Rocket Launcher. In keeping with tradition, the Demoman (Alfred Nobel) was a one-eyed dynamite-loving prospector. Unlike his modern Russian counterpart, the Heavy (John Henry) preferred to put his enemies out of commission with a monstrous sledgehammer, whilst the Sniper (Davy Crockett) partnered his trusty rifle with a coonskin cap. Prior to his appointment as President of the United States, the Pyro (Abraham Lincoln) used an experimental Flamethrower to aide his comrades in battle. BLU team's Medic (probably Sigmund Freud) appeared to retain his contemporary's love of the Bonesaw, whilst the team's Engineer (Nikola Tesla), was forced to make do with a satchel of BLUprints, rather than a PDA. Finally, the Spy (Fu Manchu) eschewed a balaclava in favour of a domino-mask and equally-sinister moustache.

Sniper's Parents

"Put mum on the phone!"

“

I'll be honest with ya: my parents do not care for it. — The Sniper on being a sniper

”

The Sniper's parents were first mentioned in Meet the Sniper. The Sniper, being a dutiful son, makes sure to keep in touch with his parents via phone or mail to inquire about their well-being and keep them up to date with his latest adventures and exploits. Living in the Red House on the Left on Adelaide St. in Australia, the Sniper's parents do not approve of his occupation. The Sniper's dad is especially condemning, calling the Sniper a "crazed gunman," against the Sniper's insistence that he is an "assassin." In a bid to bring the arguments to an end, the Sniper wrote to his mom asking her to just tell his dad about how he makes more than a doctor. Then he decides to tell his mom to tell his dad that he is a doctor now.

Zepheniah Mann and Company

From left to right: Barnabas Hale, Blutarch Mann, Zepheniah Mann, Mann's maidservant Elizabeth and Redmond Mann. A mysterious man is also seen just out of shot on the far right side.

Zepheniah Mann's will, AKA Issue #97.

Zepheniah Mann was a wealthy Englishman who was convinced by his dimwitted sons, Blutarch and Redmond, to purchase large areas of land in frontier America. He dreamed of turning the land into large pits of gravel for weapons manufacturing. On his journey over to see his newly purchased land, he was struck with almost every illness known to man, and was shocked to find his new land was an empty and useless desert. Eventually, he left a Last Will and Testament (lower right) on his own skin, which had sloughed off his body due to illness:

• To his maidservant Elizabeth he left his estate, including all deeds, accounts and debts, his tobacco plantation and the remains of his fortune. Elizabeth bears a striking resemblance to Helen, the Administrator.
• To his aide and tracker Barnabas Hale (ancestor of Saxton Hale) he left complete control of Mann & Sons Munitions Concern.
• To his "brain defective" sons, Blutarch & Redmond, he left a partnership. All of the new land they had convinced him to buy was now to be split evenly between them, so they would now have a reason to bicker endlessly. Blutarch and Redmond are still alive using a "Life Extender Machine"
• The final entry of his will is hidden, reading only as: "Lastly to... I leave the entirety of my.... and swear you to utmost secrecy in it's keeping." The figure to whom it is directed is mysteriously obscured from the family portrait.

His will also leaves a curse to anyone who should use firearms near his grave, stating that he will deliver a haunting unlike any ever seen.

True to his word, the ghost of Zepheniah will appear periodically on the event version of Harvest where he is buried, wearing his Ghastly Gibus hat. Any players who stray too close will flee in fear for several seconds, unable to jump or attack, similar to being stunned by the Sandman. He was first mentioned in the Halloween Update, as well as the above Will.