Meet the Sniper

Meet the Sniper
Video Info
Released:	June 7, 2008
Run time:	1:40

"Meet the Sniper" Video Transcript

Transcript

[A lone RV is driving down a desert road. Camera cuts to the dash, where a bobblehead of the former Civilian sits. A hand comes from offscreen and flicks the head.] Sniper: "Boom, headshot." ["Meet the Sniper" text appears. Cuts to the Sniper driving his RV as Valve's edited version of Magnum Force plays in the background.] Sniper: "Snipin's a good job, mate! It's challengin' work, outta doors. I guarantee you'll not go hungry-" [Cuts to a shot of the Sniper brushing his teeth. There are three photographs on the right of his mirror of a BLU Engineer, Heavy, and Scout - the Engineer and the Scout are crossed off, but the Heavy is not.] Sniper "-'cause at the end of the day, long as there's two people left on the planet, someone is gonna want someone dead." [Scene cuts to view inside the Sniper's scope. The Sniper headshots the Heavy from the previous scene; the bullet shatters the Bottle of the Demoman behind him, causing the top half of the Bottle to embed itself in his remaining eye. The Demoman flails around, takes out his Grenade Launcher, fires grenades wildly in the air and falls over a ledge, with his stray grenades igniting a cluster of explosive barrels below and causing a chain explosion.] Sniper: "Ooh." [Cuts to the Sniper talking on a pay phone.] Sniper: "Dad? Dad, I'm a- Ye- Not a "crazed gunman", dad, I'm an assassin! ...Well, the difference bein' one is a job and the other's mental sickness!" [Back to Sniper in the RV.] Sniper: "I'll be honest with ya: my parents do not care for it." [Cuts to Sniper climbing the tall tower in Gold Rush Stage 3, Cap 1. The Sniper now is waiting at the top of the tower for a shot.] Sniper: [Glances away from his scope briefly to address the viewer] "I think his mate saw me." [A bullet ricochets off the ledge under the Sniper.] Sniper: "Yes, yes he did!" [The Sniper takes cover as return fire ricochets off the tower.] [Cuts to a time-lapse image of the Sniper waiting for a shot. Several jars of urine fill up to his side, as the Sniper drinks coffee and waits. As the sun starts to set, the Sniper smiles and finally takes his shot.] [The Sniper backstabs a Spy through the chest with his Kukri on Gold Rush Stage 3, then slides him off the Knife with a satisfied expression.] Sniper: "Feelins'? Look mate, you know who has a lot of feelings?" [Cut back to the RV] Sniper: "Blokes what bludgeon their wife to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards." [Sniper takes off his hat and puts it on his chest, standing over the dead Spy.] Sniper: "Be polite." [Sniper head-shots a Medic, a Soldier, and a Pyro.] Sniper: "Be efficient." [Slow-motion shot of the Sniper reloading his rifle.] Sniper: "Have a plan to kill everyone you meet." [The Sniper fires directly at the camera. The screen blacks out.] [Team Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays.] [Cut back to the pay phone.] Sniper: "Dad.... Dad p-, yeah - put Mum on the phone!"

Notes

• The Sniper is driving a 1965 Land Rover Camper Van, a subtle hint to his game-style. The van also appears to be painted in 'Sahara Dust'

• The bobble-head on the Sniper's dash is a caricature of the Civilian as he appears in the original Team Fortress Classic.

• The Billboard in the opening shot and behind the Sniper in the pay phone scenes reads "FOAD: Camping Fun, All year round!" This is both a reference to the 'camping' style of gameplay Snipers employ and the acronym FOAD (Fuck Off And Die).

• The Pyro is seen wielding the Flare Gun, an unlockable weapon which had not been publicly revealed at the time of the video's release.

• The jars of urine are also the very first glimpse of Jarate.

• The phrase "Boom, headshot.", popularized by the character 'FPS Doug' in the online comedy series Template:W, is common to the first-person shooter genre.

• The Sniper's "standards" are very similar to those of the United States Marine Corps: "Be polite, be professional, have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

• The music in the video is an homage to the Magnum Force theme.

• One of the bumper stickers on the Camper reads "MY OTHER CAMPER IS A SWORD VAN!", a reference to one of KC Green's Custom Comics [1].

• A note taped to the windscreen of the camper reads "TAX IN POST", a reference to the popular British comedy 'Only Fools and Horses'.

• The Sniper's van bears the Team Fortress series logo on the roof.

• Originally, the Civilian bobblehead on the dashboard of the camper van at the beginning of the video was a bobble head of the "Old Geezer" from the "Old Geezer Draft Beer" poster found in-game holding a jug of apricot brandy. It was later replaced because the intended Sniper reference was too obscure for people to understand [2].

• The titlecard displays "COPYRIGHT LOLOLOL" on the bottom right corner, a recurring joke throughout the "Meet the Team" videos.

• The sign that appears at the beginning of the video displays the Sniper Rifle's old Headshot kill icon.