Scout responses

Voice Responses are contextually triggered lines that play after the player has achieved something, for instance killing a certain amount of enemies with a Primary or Melee Weapon, or the player has triggered something, like being set on fire. The Scout has several vocal responses, all of which are listed below (excluding Voice Commands).

Kill-related responses

After Killing More than 1 Enemy in 20 Seconds with a Primary Weapon

"That's what I'm talking about!" [Evil Laughter] [Happy Laughter] [Happy Laughter 2] "You got owned!" [Happy Laughter 3] [Happy Laughter 4] [Long Laughter] "Yeah...yeah!" [Long Laughter 2] "Not so tough now are ya? Are ya?!" "You knuckleheads ain't even worth the effort."

Destroying a building

"I broke your stupid crap, moron!"

Kill assist

"Way to go, pally!" "We got 'em, we got 'em!"

Melee kill

Shared with all melee weapons "Bonk!" "Boink!" "Say goodbye to ya kneecaps, chucklehead!" "How's that feel, wimp?" Melee killing a Heavy "Eat it, fatty!" Bat / Sandman / Atomizer kill "Yo, batter up!" "Yo, I oughta' be on a baseball card!" "I'm battin' a thousand!" "Ya head's a freakin' bat magnet!" "'Ey, is somebody keepin' track of my heads batted in?" Holy Mackerel / Fan O'War kill "Yeah, I dare ya, rage quit. C'mon, make us both happy." "Oh hey! You suck." [Happy Laughter] "You got owned!" Candy Cane kill "Sweet!" "You're all losers!" "You wimps suck!" Boston Basher / Three-Rune Blade kill "Man, your skull's so soft you're makin' this easy!" "I wasted you!" Sun-on-a-Stick kill "Ey, who's on fire now?" "Is-is anybody even payin' attention ta me?" "What's the matter? You freaking stupid?"

Domination-related responses

Domination

"Yeah, that's right!" "You're gettin' dominated, chucklehead!" "'Domination'. Look it up. "You're like a car crash in slow motion. It's like I'm watchin' ya fly through a windshield."

Dominating a Scout

"Hit the bricks, pal, you're done." "Ha ha! Look at you! You look like you ran through traffic!" "Hey knucklehead, you ain't gonna win." "Oh what, you gonna cry? You gonna cry now?" "Yeah, I dare ya, rage quit. C'mon, make us both happy." "I will never... stop... killing you." "You... are... terrible!" "I am the Scout here!" "This map ain't big enough for the two of us." "Hit the road, bozo, let a real Scout get to work!" "You're like a car crash in slow motion. It's like I'm watchin' ya fly through a windshield."

Dominating a Soldier

"Yo, I'm not even wearing a helmet!" "What is your major malfunction, brother?" "Drop dead and give me 20!" "You're a disgrace to your uniform, pal!" (Imitating Soldier) "Dis-missed!" "There ain't enough crits in the world to kill me!"

Dominating a Pyro

"It's starting to bore me how much you suck." "Hey, who's on fire now?" "Yo, if you didn't want me to kill ya, ya shoulda said somethin'!" "Repeat after me: mmmmmm I'm dead!'" "Take that, ya dumb, bib-wearin' dope!" "Eat it, ya mute, frickin' moron!" "Yeah, nice moves, mumbles!" "Dude, you'd get a closed casket at the ugly cemetery."

25px  Dominating a Demoman

"You just got freakin' dominated, knucklehead, alright let's do this." "I don't usually kill morons this fast." "Yeah, next time, try two eyes!" "Blow that up, cyclops!" "The best man won, ya bomb-throwing drunk!" "Your clock just got cleaned, rummy!" "Depth perception, pal, look into it."

Dominating a Heavy

"Drink it in, pal. That's how failure tastes." "Would you look at you? I mean, look at you." "I am owning you, you fat, bald bastard!" "Today ain't yer day, pancakes!" "$400,000 to fire that gun, huh? Yeah, money well spent!" "Them $200 bullets ain't so hot when they don't hit nothin', are they?" "I think I'll take Sasha out for a steak dinner tonight. What do you think about that?" "Ain't so hard now, are ya, fat-cakes?" "I... eat... your...sandviches. I eat 'em up!" "Nice hustle, 'tons of fun'! Next time, eat a salad!" "Hey lard-fat, those hard arteries don't stop bullets, do they? "I am owning you, you fat, bald, fatty fat... fat fat!"

Dominating an Engineer

"Is that all you got, moron?" "Hey, here's something you can invent next time: ducking!" "Here's something you shoulda built: a not-dyin' machine!" "Don't bring a wrench to a gunfight!" "Here's a schematic for ya: my ass!" "Hey overalls! You suck!" "Lotta good that hard hat did ya!"

Dominating a Medic

"If you order now, I'll throw in a second beatin', absolutely free." "Diagnosis: you suck!" "Ooh hoo hoo, your gun shoots medicine! It's intimidating!" "Where's your precious Hippo-crates now?" "Real nice effort, Deutsch-bag!" ("Deutsch" is German for "German") "I... hate... doctors!" "[sigh] Doctor, doctor, doctor..."

Dominating a Sniper

"Look at this, just caved in your skull, my Bat's still dry. No clumps of hair, nothin'." "Snipe that, ya frickin' coward!" "That fancy scope of yours, bet ya got a REAL good view of me killin' ya!" "You camped the whole time for this?!" "It was a mercy killin', ya live in a... camper van!" "You'll never hit me! You'll never hit my tiny head! It's so tiny I got a frickin'... such a tiny li'l head!"

Dominating a Spy

"Disguise dat!" "Dominated, ya shapeshiftin' rat!" "Hard to stab a guy in the back when he's beatin' ya freakin' head in, huh?" "Hehey, look, you shapeshifted into a dead guy!"

Dominating an enemy with a melee kill

"If you order now, I'll throw in a second beatin', absolutely free." "Pop quiz: how long's it take to beat a moron to death? (buzzer imitation) Sorry, time's up, you're dead."

Revenge Kill

"I wasted you!" "How do ya like me now, blockhead?" "Ya like that, chucklenuts? "Boom! I'm back, dummy!" "Remember me? Yeah, ya do!" Don't you ever cross me again! "What have we learned? I always win!" "Who's the tough guy now, huh, tough guy?" "Still think you're funny, funny-man?" "Bang! I make it look easy!" "I did it" "If you order now, I'll throw in a second beatin', absolutely free." "Wassamatter, y'freakin' stupid?" "Hey, nice shootin' there!" "Ya got anything smart ta say now?"

Event-related responses

Round Start

"Play ball!" "Let's get 'em!" "Eat my dust!" "Woohoo!" "Let's waste 'em!"

Sudden Death

"This sucks on ice!" "Boooooooo!" (Blows a Raspberry) "Frickin' unbelievable." "This did not just happen!" "No seriously, you all suck!" "What the hell is your guys' problem?" "Ah, jeez!" "This sucks!" "What the hell was that crap?" "This is a real frickin' embarrassment." "'Kay, this does not look good here, um..."

Stalemate

"You have got to be kidding!" "You gotta be kiddin' me!" "I can not believe this!" "Auugghh!"

Set on Fire

"Fire, fire, fire!" "Oh I'm burnin', I'm-I'm burnin'!"

Hit by Jarate or Mad Milk

"Awwww!" "Auugghh!" "Ah, jeez!"

Teleportation

"Thanks for the ride!" "Hey good job there, hardhat!" "Thanks for that, tough guy!"

Healed by Medic

"Alright, I feel good." "[deep exhale] Yeah, thanks, doc." "Thanks, doc."

Under the effects of an ÜberCharge

"Ya got anything smart ta say now?" "Look at me!" "Ooooh yeah, you're real scary!" "Hey, lotta' good that gun didya!"

Upon picking up a baseball

"Got da ball back!" "Play ball!" "Found my ball!" "Oh dere's my ball!" "I love my ball!"

Being attacked while on red health, Bonk! Atomic Punch equipped

"C'mon, c'mon!" "Work, dammit!" "Ah, crap!" "What?!" "Aw, crap." "Ah, crap!"

On Death

[Dying scream] [Dying scream] [Dying scream]

Achievement Unlocked

"Hey, look at me, look at me!" "Hey, look at me, Ma!" "Aw, fellas!" "Hi, Ma!" "Look at me!" "No otha' class gonna do dat!" "You see dat?" "You seein' dis?" "I'll put it in my trophy room, with the othas." "I don't know who to thank first... oh, I know, me!'"' "Bang! I make it look easy."

Weapon-related responses

Upon drinking Bonk! Atomic Punch

"Un-freakin'-touchable!" "Ya can't hit what ain't dere!" "Wananananana..." (Sound effect from The Million Dollar Man) "I'm a freakin' blur here!" "(Demandingly) Look at me!"

Dodging shots under Bonk! Atomic Punch's influence

"Ha." "Missed me!" "Dat didn't hurt." "Psyche!" "Nice try, pal!" "Oh what's up?" "Didn't hurt." "Woo!" "Heheh." "Eyy!" "Yeah!" "Oop!" "Wah!" "Wa-ha!" "Ho-wah!" "Wah!" "Ha!" "Nope!" "Sor-ry!" "Nope." "De-nied!" "Woosh!" "Ping!" (Sarcastically) "What?!" "Ahah!" "Poing!" "Eheheh." (Whooshing sound) "Aheheh." "Weak!" "Dummy!" "Moron!" "Dumbass!" "Nice aim!" "Punk!" "Wuss!" "Yoink!" "Too slow!" "Yoink!" "So close!"

Firing a weapon while under the effects of Crit-a-Cola

Only spoken if the attack occurs about 1 second from the activation. "You morons are about to catch a real beatin'." "You seein' dis?" "That's what I'm talking about!"

Crit-a-Cola's effects wear off

"Ah, crap!" "What?!" "Aw, crap."

Mad Milk toss

"Yo, heads up!" "Hey, wimps!" "Catch dis."

On stunning an enemy

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit ya... No, wait, yeah I did." "Oh, dat's a skull fracture for sure!" "Ohh, I got alla dat one." "Dere's a dingah for ya!" "Downtown!" "Home-frickin'-run!" "Gotta nice piece a dat!" "Nice catch, knucklehead!" "Good 'ands, buddy!" "Good catch, dummy!" "Wayta duck!" "Nice hustle!" "Yo, heads up!" "Ding-dong!" "Think fast, chucklenuts!" "Real smooth, dummy!"

Attacking with the Sandman

"Batter up!" "Catch dis." "Batta swing!" "Major League!"

Double jumping

"Hehey, I'm flyin'!" "Woo hoo hoo!" "Look at you chuckleheads down there!" "Hey, I can see my base from here!" "Look at me, Ma!"

Apex of triple jump

"Woohoohoohoo!" "Yeaheaheah!" "Woooooo!" "Yeaahehehhh!"

Objective-related responses

After Picking Up Intelligence

"Wave goodbye to your secret crap, dumbass!"

After Capturing Intelligence

"Yeah, it's ours now!" "I'm not even winded." "I got it, I got it, I got it!" "Is-is anybody even payin' attention ta me?"

After Capturing Control Point

"Yeah, yeah, yeah!" "Yeah!" "I got it, I got it!" "No problem!"

Standing on captured Point, firing weapon

"Stand on the freakin' point, you moron!" "Get on the freakin' point, dumbass!"

Standing on a cappable Control Point, firing weapon

"Hey, get on the cap, guys!" "Stand on the freakin' cap!" "Let's get on the cap, fellas!" "Get on the cap, ya dopes!"

Defense

"Way to go slugger!" "Yes!" "Oh yeah!" "Ooooh yeah, you're real scary!" "Hey, lotta' good that gun didya!" "Oh hey! You suck." "Yeah, it's ours now!"

Payload-related responses

Attacking: Cart Goes Forward

"Push!" "Mush, you lazy bums!" "Keep pushin' it!" "Yeah, yeah, yeah!" "Keep it movin', guys!" "Go, go, go!"

Attacking: Cart Goes Back

"Dat ain't da right way, guys!" "What da hell's goin' on?" "Aw, cripes, da cart!" "Is someone gonna push da freakin' cart?" "Da cart's movin' backwards!" "Aw, jeez, da cart!" "No, no, no! The cart!" "Anyone else pushing dis thing?"

Defending: Cart Goes Forward

"We gotta stop dat thing!" "Aw, jeez guys, we gotta stop it!" "What the hell is everyone doin'?!" "Push da freakin' cart!" "Keep dat cart movin'!" "C'mon, move da cart!"

Defending: Cart Goes Back

"Return to freakin' sender!" "Alright, alright!" "Hey now we're doin' it, now we're doin' it!" "Yeah, yeah, yeah!" "What, ya guys give up?" "Yo, it should be goin' dat way!"

Attacking: Stay Close to Cart

"Stay by the cart, fellas!" "Get over here!" "Stay close, guys!" "Let's all push this thing!" "We pushin' this thing or what?" "Li'l help pushin' the cart?"

Attacking: Cart Has Stopped

"The freakin' cart stopped!" "What da hell?! Who stopped pushin' the cart?!" "Push it, push it, push it!"

Defending: Stop The Bomb

"Ey, we gotta stop it!" "Gotta stop da cart!" "Let's stop dat freakin' thing!"

Mann vs. Machine responses

After a Wave

Receiving Loot in Mann Up mode

Common Loot "Yeah!" "(laughs) Oh yeah!" "Sweet." "Come to daddy!" "(laughs) Oh yeah!" Rare Loot "Ooooh! Yeah!" "Wow!"

Duel-related responses

Starting a Duel

"Let's go." "Bring it." "Let's do dis." "You 'n me." "C'mon, tough guy!"

Duel Accepted

"Sweet!" "Ooooh yeah, you're real scary!" "I'm gonna headbutt cha', I'm gonna headbutt cha', I'm gonna headbutt cha'!" "Yeah, come get some, you frickin' wuss!" "Yeah!"

Duel Rejected

"You have got to be kidding!" "You gotta be kiddin' me!" "I can not believe this!" "Auugghh!" "Yeah, I dare ya, rage quit. C'mon, make us both happy." "I will never... stop... killing you." "Boooooooo!" "Frickin' unbelieveable." "Wassamatter, y'freakin' stupid?"

Halloween / Full Moon responses

Wheel of Fate outcomes

Dance Off fate

"Born to dance! Born to dance, brother!"

Super Jump fate

"Hey, look at my feet!"

No Gravity fate

"Gravity? Who gives a crap about gravity?"

Big Head fate

"Oh God, my head is huge!" "Oh God. My head is huge!" "Oh, my head is so big!" "Oh, my beautiful head!" "Don't look at me, I'm hideous!" "Don't look at me, I'm slightly less handsome!"

Small Head fate

"Ahh, I gotta teeny tiny little head over here!" "Ahh, my teeny tiny little head!" "Oh, my head is so small!" "Oh, my beautiful head!" "Don't look at me, I'm hideous!" "Don't look at me, I'm slightly less handsome!" "Real small over here!"

Whammy fate (Bleeding variant)

"Ah, my blood! He spelled out all my blood!" "My blood!" "Ah, my blood!"

Positive fate

"Yeah, lookin' good over here!" "This ain't no spell, I am this good!"

Negative fate

"Uuh!" "Bluh!" "Uh oh." "Oh this ain't good." "Aww crap." "Aw crap."

During battle with Merasmus

Head turned into bomb

"Hehehe, you got a bomb on your head. Aw crap, I got a bomb on my head!" "Aw crap, I got a bomb on my head!" "Bomb on my head! Bomb on my head!" "Head bomb, head bomb, coming through!"

Successfully stun Merasmus

"Oh man! I'm gonna screw that wizard up!" "Yeah! Where you at Merasmus?" "Ye-he-ha-yeah!" "Oh hell yeah!" "Wuh huh huh hoo!" "Where you at Merasmus? Calling you out ya stupid wizard!" "He-hey, Siegfried and Roy! I am gonna mess...you...up!" "Wooh! Check it out Casper!" "I am gonna mess...you...up!"

Merasmus hides

"Yeah, you better hide, you wand-wavin' moron!"

Looking for Merasmus

"Come on out, ya see-through marshmallow!" "Get out here, spellcakes!" "I hate wizards so much." "Where da hell is that wizard?" "Hey Houdini, where ya hidin'?" "Aw, come on out, ya stupid wizard." "Nobody likes wizards, ya hear me? You're doomed to die alone." "I hate ghosts so much." "I hate ghosts so much. Just be solid already, stupid ghosts." "You know what, you're not scary, you're just weird." "I'm gonna cave your little ghost skull in, magic man!" "We're gonna make you wish you never entered the Dark Arts!" "I'll show you some eldritch horror, H.P. Dumbcraft! (laughs)"

Miscellaneous

Falling in Bottomless Pit in Ghost Fort or Helltower

(screaming) (screaming) (screaming) "Holy crap, this goes on forever."

Scared by a Ghost

(shrieks) "So scared!" "Gah! Running!"

Unknown condition

"Next time a wizard asks you to be his roommate, you say 'No!', Soldier!"

Helltower responses

Round Start

"Let's get dis mummy movin', guys!" "Dis ol' fossil ain't gonna move himself, guys!"

Cart Stops

"Move da mummy!"

The Witching Hour: Bridge Appears

"Bridge is down!" "Woo! Dere's da bridge!" "Hey, get to da bridge!" "Bridge time, everybody!" "Get ta the island!" "Woo-hoo-hoo! Let's go get some free crap!" "It's da Witchin' Hour! Let's go!" "Free crap!"

Collected Normal Spell

"Oh, it's magic time!"

Collected Rare Spell

"I am the lord of all magic!" "I am a freakin' wizard!" "You shall not freakin' pass!" "I am full of freakin' magic!" "I! Love! Magic!"

Reacting to Rare Spells

"Can't. Stop. Da magic!" "So much magic!" "Are you freakin' kidding me?" "It's happening! Oh God! It's happening!" "It's too much magic! It's too much magic!" "No! NO! It's too much magic!" "We toiled in God's domain!" "Oh no! I knew this would happen! I foresaw dis!"

Casting Spells

"Caputus crepitus!" "Pactum diabolus!" "Seismela tremoro!" "Barpo kabalto!" "Barpo invisium!" "Imputum fulmenus!" "Invokum monoculus!" "Amplus tripudio!" "Paidum celeris!" "Ipsum instantarium!" "Deus invictus!" "Mortis animataris!"

Item-related responses

With Voodoo-Cursed Scout Soul equipped

Idle

"Grass grows, sun shines, birds fly, and brother, I come back from the dead!" "Brains! Man, I would kill for some brains here!" "Hey, I love brains." "Aw, y-ya know what would hit the spot? Brains! They're delicious!" "It's not original, but it's true, I love brains."

With Haunted Hat equipped

These responses override the default response for that category.

Round Start

"Big muscles? Check. Scary hat? Check. All right, yeah! Let's do dis!" "You an' me, Scary Ghost Hat! Let's do dis!" "Let's go over da plan, Scary Hat. I'll run around an' be awesome, you float over my head. Got it?" "Oh man, look at dis hat! Dis hat's so scary, my head just got scared!" "You--you wanna see somethin' scary? Look slightly above my head. Yeah. Dat's right, scary ghost hat." "Oh man, look at dis scary hat, floatin' above my head like a ghost or somethin'. Oh, this hat's so great, I'm jealous of me!" "Hey! Check out my scary hat! Scary expensive, dat is! Yeah, I'm rich." "Wait'll these guys get a load of my hat! BAM! Yeah, it's haunted." "You guys notice anything new about me? Specifically the top part of my head? Yeah, it's a -- it's a super-scary hat. No big deal."

After Capturing Control Point

"Hey, it's okay, guys. Scary Hat and I got dis!" "Scary Hat and I got point!" "Stay frosty, Scary Hat!"

Attacking: Cart Goes Forward

"Push, Scary Hat! Push!" "Come on, Scary Hat! Push! I believe in you!"

After Picking Up Intelligence

"Nice work, Scary Hat!" "We're doin' this, Scary Hat!" "You an' me, Scary Hat!"

After Capturing Intelligence

"We did it, Scary Hat! We did it together." "He-hey, we did it, Scary Hat! You're my best friend." "We did it, Scary Hat! We did it because we're best friends." "Wait'll the guys see this, Scary Hat!"

Domination

"You just got dominated by a handsome man in a frightening hat. Deal wit' it!" "I know what you're asking yourself: 'Was I scared to death by this man's ghost hat?' But nah, I just killed ya."

Set on Fire

(scream) "Save yourself, Scary Hat!" (scream) "Scary Hat! This is all your fault!" (scream) "Oh God, my ghost hat's on fire!"

Scared by a Ghost

"Don't look, Scary Hat! "Oh--oh my god, dat is almost as scary as my hat!"

With Magical Mercenary equipped

These responses override the default response for that category.

Round Start

"Clippy-clop, over here! I'm a pretty pink horse!" "Yeah, laugh it up! You know what girls love? Unicorns! Look it up!" "You can't put a saddle on me, brotha! I am like pink wind." "Yeah, laugh it up! I will gore your ass wit' dis thing." "I am not a unicorn! I'm a pink rhinoceros!" "Unicorn power!"

Domination

"Friendship is freakin' magic, pal!" "You mess with da horse? You get da horn!" "Oh, I just clippy-clopped my hoof up your ass!" "Dat is how a unicorn lays down the freakin' hurt!" "Dat is how a unicorn gets it done, son!" "Where's your fairy tale ending, Rapunzel? Huh? Where'd it go?!" "Every time a unicorn kills ya, ya get to make a wish!" "Yeah, I heard ya laughin' earlier. But it's okay - 'cause ya dead!"

Attacking: Cart Goes Forward

"Come on, push! Unicorn power!"

Set on Fire

"My pony magic does nothing!" (short scream) "Unicorn on fire! Unicorn on fire!"

Under the effects of an ÜberCharge

"I am a horned nightmare!" "I am an invincible unicorn!"

Unused Responses

Domination

Both of the lines below lack lip synching. "Are you even tryin'?" "Yo, did ya even see me hittin' ya?"